A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i'm worried.i like to watch gay porn, i get arroused by men's penis's. i've joined gay chats and talk, jacked off to the dirty talk, watched tehm on web cam, wanted to do things, but i dont real slightly attracted to them at all, in the way like kissing them, or dated them makes me feel sick, what am i?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2010): i am 20 and i have had sex with men and wowman. i gess im bi but i am in a serious relashonship now and planning on perposin to her soon. but when i was your age i whatched gay porn as well i was extreamly confused. i learnd through the years that it might not be the fact that is gay porn it might be that it seams forbiden thus giving it more of an alur or that mutupul men cuming makes you horny this dosent me your gay you culd be bicurios. you are going thourgh a tuff develupmental time, so do what fealls right. you culd be striat, gay or even bi it really dosent matter. your bicurios so what i was every one is at some time theirs nothing wrong with it
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2010): Internalised homophobia. You are a little traumatised by your emerging sexual identity and this explains why you feel 'sick', ashamed, maybe a little humiliated by the content of your fantasies and the fact that you have powerful lusts for men - as I recall, the feeling is delirious, feverish and undeniably traumatic. If you could make it all go away, you would.
It's not easy to deal with at age 16. You'd love to press a button to magically 'cure' you of being gay. You probably wish from time to time that you'd turned out straight. But the point is, you haven't. You can't help your sexual identity, and you can't force yourself to be straight.
You probably grew up hearing all kinds of nasty things being said about 'them' and now it turns out you are one. Of course that's scary. Society makes you feel as if you've 'failed' at being a proper male. There are two types of gay guys: those who hate themselves for it and beat themselves up about it, and those who learn to embrace their sexual identity and love it. Guess which ones are happier? Which ones have more fulfilling sex lives? Turn out to be well-adjusted human beings?
It gets easier. 16 is about the worst. You mention touching yourself while you watch gay porn - maybe at a remove, at a safe distance in front of a DVD or computer, the fantasy of raw gay sex seems somehow 'safe' whereas the idea of really going for it with a real live man 'in the flesh' seems TERRIFYING. Sex IS scary, definitely at first, so don't rush into anything, and when you do, make sure it's with a nice man you can trust. The first time I gave a BJ (at 16) I was shaking with nerves beforehand, nearly got sick afterwards, and cried myself to sleep that night. Now, at age 20? I llllove men and I llllove sex and I don't care what anyone thinks. It's a gradual process. Take it slow and STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP ABOUT IT!
You'll be fine. Take care.
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A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (12 August 2010):
 I'll disagree with kevin3007 that masturbation isn't healthy. It is perfectly natural and healty.
I think you're curious and scared. It might not be the worst thing to try. If gay porn does it for you, then you likely have some tendencies. That doesn't necessarilly make you gay. Humans are sexual beings. I think everyone is a little gay and a little straight. You just have to find out what you're comfortable with when it comes to relationships. That will tell you truely what orientation you prefer.
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A
male
reader, kevin3007 +, writes (12 August 2010):
 hey mate i am 16 i am gay i love kissing boys but sleeping with them makes me sick and watching gay porn makes me even sicker ......you are mini-gay means you like to have fun and fool around cause if you were a real gay you'd care more about the feelings cause you know sex will come later ....so take the time to know who you are brother ...good luck
ps: don't masturbate it's not healthy
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2010): You are young and curious. You should try kissing and making out with a man. If you like it, well then that's great!
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