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female
,
anonymous
writes: I've been seeing a man for 4 months, for the first time in about 10 years i have met someone who has truly made me happy. From day one there were no games, just open fun communication, clicking and getting on well. He has done nothing to make me doubt our relationship. At the weekend he recieved a phone call from his sister saying his dad had been rushed to hosipital with a suspected stroke, he has many health proplems, early onset of alzheimers, diabetic and is an alcoholic. He bombards my boyfriend with daily calls confused and agitated. He deals with it but its not easy. His mother died 10 years ago from cancer.Ever since the call of his dad having a stroke he has suddenly jsut shut me out of his life, i am tryiing to give him space but he wont answer my calls. i've only called three times in the last 5 days and i've texted a couple of times and hes ignoring me. I am trying so hard to understand, respect and appreciate what he is going throug but his silence is causing me so much pain, i feel sad and angry, so angry. I got an email from him on tuesday apologising for being off at the weekend but he has lot to deal with and is used to dealing with problems on his own. He asked for forgiveness for not returning my calls, i responded saying i respected his feelings and to remember i am here when he needs me, yet hes still avoiding me. He fears he is being made redundant as well and finds out tomorrow, i cant bear him not getting in touch. Everything has changed overnight, hes just shut me out completely, i dont know what to do
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2006):
BACK OFF
Three calls and an email is 5 days is not giving him space.
He knows how to get a hold of you. Just wait until he does.
In the meantime, call you own father.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2006): There is nothing more that you can do im afraid, when my dad died i shut myself away from the world as well. You sound like a lovely lady and he is so lucky to have you and deep down he knows its upsetting you or he wouldnt have sent you a reply apologising. Please be patient with him all he needs is time and you have done the right thing telling him you will support him. Please dont blame yourself and please dont blame him its just curcumstance im afraid. Reassure him that your at the end of the phone for him or if he needs some caring arms you will be there but im afraid thats all you can do till he asks for help, i hope things work out for you both because you sound like a nice couple please be gentle on each other love sue x
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