A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been getting a lot of nos lately. "No, I can't go out on a date with you." "No, I have a boyfriend." "No, you can not have my number."Those are just examples of what I've been going through lately. I don't get it. I can understand that when a girl says no, she means it. But why is it that my friends bypass this little detail AND STILL get the girl?Ex; My friend asked this girl the other day for her number, she refused. The next day he flirted with her some more, she somehow changed her mind and gave him the number. They both go out now.Ex 2; My other friend asked this girl out, she said no, she had a boyfriend. He continued to flirt and a couple days later he managed to get her to send sexy photos (lingerie) of herself to his phone.What is going on?? Am I doing it wrong? Should I still persist even after being told no? Is this just a game for women? Do they like being chased even when they say no?When a girl tells me no, I take it as just that. I leave her alone and move on. I still do like her but then I remember that she has already rejected me. That was the end of the story for me. But now it has me thinking, can I try again? Will she change her mind? What is it ladies? Why would you change your mind for a man you have already turned down?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2012): yes this happened to me, a boy flirted with me for months and kept trying to get me to go out with him.. and I slowly went from hating him to dating him...I'm not sure how exactly, I think he wore me down with his enthusiasm. Try to get clues from her reaction, is she teasing you or does she seem genuinely creeped out? You don't want to seem like a stalker after all, but sometimes it might be worth pursuing. If she says, no, I have a boyfriend, then obviously that's pretty definate, but if she just says something like, not this week, or not right now, maybe you still have a chance in that context.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (19 August 2012):
 One time a guy asked me out and I said no, and then he asked me out again 2 years later and I said yes, but that's the only time. I think it's safest to assume no means no.
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A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (19 August 2012):
 For me when I say no I mean I am not interested. And if the guy keeps trying he seems stalkerish and desperate. You are right to move on if a girl tells you no. Most likely she means it and to continue persuing her you can come off as creepy and dumb. If she's the type that plays games and wants you to try and try to chase her who wants her anyway? I always hated it when I told a guy I had a boyfriend and he continued to text me, it was like really? Get some self respect I said I'm not interested. I couldn't tell you what happened with the examples you gave, but I definitely mean it when I say I'm not interested.
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A
female
reader, icanhelp  +, writes (19 August 2012):
well, if a girl says no it could be because she's feeling shy or is nervous that you're not serious. girls don't want to make a fool of themselves. try flirting some more and hen ask again. if she says no twice then leave it - she knows you like her so if she changes her mind she let you know. however if they say no because they have boyfriends you should definatly just leave it after the once.
when my boyfriend asked me out three years ago i said no - because i felt to scared to say yes. i didn't know what i wanted but he asked again and now we've been out for over a year. take your time and if its meant to be then it will all work out.
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