| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I have been dating a man for two months. He lives alone and have one grown stepson. His wife died almost three years ago, still he is stuck in a shell. He has not moved on. I finally got him to give her clothes away after the Katrina struck. He is 60 years old, I am 59, and was married for 30 years. After sleeping over with me, he spends at least an hour the following day at her grave site. I suppose he is explaining to her what he has been doing. smile My question to you is: does this seem normal or really what is going on in his head? He still cooks a full course meal after working all day because she did not like to cook when she was alive. She did the cooking. Am I wasting my time? I am divorced for ten years now.
View related questions:
divorce Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, wishes +, writes (23 September 2005):
 Stop trying to compete with a dead woman (sorry to be frank) and just enjoy your time with this man. It will take him a while to not feel guilty about being happy with someone other than hes wife. He has obviously not stopped loving her. Dont try and push him away from her, or get him to forget about her, instead try to get to know what she was like, spend time letting him talk about her, letting him know that you realise that he was a big part of her life and probably made him into what he is today. Cherish her memories- dont try and compare yourself or pressure him into letting go of her. Everything takes time. If you think he is worth it, you will be patient. Best wishes. x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2005): I wrote the problem. I am awaiting an answer. One mistake: she did not like to cook, so he did the cooking
...............................
A
female
reader, wicky +, writes (22 September 2005):
Just go out on fun dates and concentrate on enjoying yourself. You might be just what he needs to move on in his life. I know it may sound a bit blunt but there really is no point in feeling threatened by his wife, is there? If you like him, then go for it. Just take things slowly. Everyone is different and people take different lengths of time to get over a death!
...............................
|
