A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:So I dated a guy for a few weeks. The day before he broke it off with me and said he wanted to be "just friend" he had told me he was starting to like me etc etc. Well after that he broke it off and started with the whole friends thing. Anyways we have kept in contact we went to lunch 2 weeks ago and are planning to go to the movies soon. Its hard for me because I have feelings for him but I would rather have him as a friend than not be in my life at all. Now why would he even suggest being friends and continue to hangout with me...is he confused? Want to keep me in his back pocket just in case he changes his mind? I'm so confused. I can tell he is still attracted to me. What shall I do? I really like him :( Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): That is really up to you if you can handle just be friends, then be his friend. Usually when a guy starts dating you and then backs off and says they want to be just friends, it means that they are not attracted to you romantically, but think you may be a nice person to hang out with.If you really like him more than that, then I think it would be best FOR YOU to get your energy out of there and exit the relationship entirely. You don't owe him friendship and he doesn't owe you the relationship you want.Besides, if you leave and start dating some other people he may realize he does have stronger feelings for you than friendship and come chasing you wanting that...but if you accept being just his friend, it is going to be very difficult to ever get out of the friend zone. And you certainly do not want to be friends with benefits, that usually ends up with someone getting hurt, most likely you.
A
female
reader, Skarletina  +, writes (2 January 2010):
run before it hurts. i think he's just keeping his options open, or maybe isn't ready for a relationship. don't pressure him but if the whole friendship thing goes on for too long i'd say leave.
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