A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm a bit confused about a girl I met this year, and whether she is actually interested in me or not.Basically I met her last autumn, we hit it off great and had loads in common. I was really excited after meeting her as it was the first time I'd met someone I clicked with since ending my last relationship. Anyway we texted a lot over the next couple of weeks and she admitted she was really keen, so we met up and it went great, we ended up kissing. Things carried on the same after this so we met up again soon after and it went well again, this time we took it a bit further. This is where the problem started, I then left town for a couple of weeks for Xmas, but we still kept in touch and I expected to see her again when I got back, but for one reason or another we never have. Sometimes our schedules conflict, sometimes it's been a while since she's contacted me so I feel akward asking her out totally out of the blue. Everytime I feel like I should let it go and not bother contacting her again, she texts me and it starts again, but never to the point where I feel confident to ask her out.Normally by now I would've given up but it just seems such a shame when we got/get along so well and obviously like each other. I'm pretty good at taking hints and I've never really got the feeling she's trying to get rid of me but can't say it, so I don't know what to make of the situation!Does anyone have any ideas what she could think about me?
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female
reader, malvern  + ♥, writes (26 April 2009):
 Take the bull by the horns and just ask her out. At worst she will say no but at least you'll then know where you stand and you can stop worrying about her. If she says yes then you can take it from there. She's probrably wondering why you've not asked her out and may be thinking you are no longer interested in her. The fact that she has text you is a very good sign. She wouldn't have done that if she wasn't interested. Old fashioned though it is, girls can only take things up to a certain point but they generally expect the guy to take over and do the asking out. Girls still expect the man to take the lead in a relationship as they have done since time began. It's the old 'Knight in shining armour' stuff ... he wants me, he's come to sweep me off my feet, kind of thing!!
A
male
reader, Darren_AgonyUncle +, writes (26 April 2009):
Ok, it seems to me as if you do have something worth going for here, it’s obvious you have feelings for her and likewise with her if she does text you, which shows she does think about you. You say you both have loads in common and both clicked as soon as you met, and that you have already gone out together. The time over Xmas you went away for seems to have brought things to a pause and has hindered communication and is the reason you are feeling awkward about asking her out again, to me it seems nerves play a role here as well as maybe you are unsure if you’re feelings will be reciprocated. If she does have feelings for you it would be better to find out sooner than later, but as you are uncertain about ‘asking her out’ why don’t you try asking more casual instead of it being a date just to improve communication between you both and go from there. As for giving up, I don’t really see that as a positive option, if you have feelings for her it’s best to find out how she feels as you will regret not doing this in the future more than not taking a chance that something good could come of.
Please let me know if my advice is of any help,
Best wishes,
Darren.
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