A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I became really close to somebody, and we admitted that we had strong feelings for each other, physically and emotionally, we have a lot of stuff in common, and we both felt a connection with each other, although nothing physical happened between us.The thing is, she has a partner and a young son. Their relationship has not been good for a long time, but they are trying to make it work for their son. This girl and I have agreed that we'd reached a point where a line was going to be crossed and we have stopped seeing each other. The thing is, we work together so invetably see each other from time to time, and when we do, it is obvious that we are both finding it hard to hide from our true feelings.My question is, do you think you can fall out of love with someone and in love with someone else? How long should you pursue a rubbish relationship for the sake of a child? Would a child be happier in a happier home? I realli believe that I have met somebody I could spend my life with, with her son too, and I think she feels the same way, but she is trapped. I'd never force her to do anything, and her priority is, rightly, her son, but I just wondered whether people think it is possible to find the right person at the wrong time? And what do you do about it?
View related questions:
trapped Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (9 November 2009):
I think she's trying to save her relationship because she still loves him. It sounds to me that you were the shoulder to lean on. the truth is, if she wanted to be with you, she would have left him. I think you need to try and move on
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2009): Its obvious that you shouldn't have started a relationship with her in the first place because she has a partner, this probably makes her feel uncomfortable, it sounds like she really does have feelings for you, and you sound genuine towards her aswell, but surely if she really wanted to be with you, if she felt the way that you do she would have left her partner. Its best for her son to be living in a happy environment, but if this woman and her partner have been having problems then maybe its best if hes in a loving environment. You need to speak to this woman and tell her about your feelings, its the only way you are going to sort things out. You either have to talk to her and sort things out between you and her, and her family. Or you have to move on. And i know this may sound impossible at the moment but you will be able to make it if you do it. You have to be in her life without being immobilised by your feelings. I dont believe you can fall out of love but i believe that you can repress the feelings, and after time they fade a lot. If she is the right person for you, you will both know, as you rightly said her priority is her son and it is great to her you say that you want to take on the role as well as her partner. I hope this helps, good luck :)
...............................
|
