A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Do you think most marriages becomes sexless,after 20 years,and people just decide to stay together?Or it is just my therapist who says that? She says , just read any statistics, on this, people can't be sexual for 40 years..' She said it's no longer stimulating, and many times ,man losing erections, with the same woman...Now is this tru,or not?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): ok, what is the reason you and hubby are seeking the services of a therapist for? and on what basis has the good professional therapist quoted you stats?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): Britt hit it right on (again). Hormones get screwed up after menopause, but can stabilize with HRT. Women (and men) can also compensate for the new lack of primal sex drive by enjoying sex for the related love and affection.
Men can also have hormone problems, mostly in their 60s and beyond, but it can also rarely happen as young as the 20s and is not that unusual in their 40s and 50s. The main problem for men is low testosterone. Either the pituitary stops telling the testes to produce T or the testes stop working properly. It is then time for HRT (often called TRT) for men. It happened to me at about age 62 and I use testosterone much as women use estrogen after menopause.
Some couples have an end of their sexual relationship after 2 or 3 years of marriage and some couples have a good sex life for many decades and into their 70s and sometimes beyond. The length of time is not a set thing, but dependent on how good the relationship is and how hard both parties work on their relationship. Good relationships don't just magically continue the vast majority of the time. They take work. There are changes in both lives. There are disagreements. There are arguments. How these problems are handled are what determine how loving the relationship is and that determines to a large extent how good the sex is.
My wife and I have been together for over 30 years and married for over 23 years. The sex is still great most of the time. OK, twice a day or 10 times a week is just a fond memory, but not because of our desire. It is because men in their 60s just cannot perform that often. We are still a 4 or 5 times a week couple most weeks. We have had our down times throughout the marriage. There was stress at work at times or stress at home at times, but we always recovered and sex and the other parts of the relationship returned to normal and good. We are at each other almost as much as we were the first few years dating. Now if I could just get my little buddy to stop being so lazy. :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2009): Time to find a new Therapist! Obviously she must be in a loveless, sexless marriage!
Why would a therapist say something like that???
It's true while women are going through menopause the may lose thier sex drive temporarily, but trust me it returns with a vengeance!
Also, men could possibly have problems, once in thier 60's and over, but all that can be compensated for! If two people are in-love and attracted to each other they can enjoy sexual adventure all of thier lives together!
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (14 May 2009):
 Your therapist needs a therapist.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2009): well then i am in trouble- plse tell your terapist that i am married for almost 18 yrs and the sex is great (better than when we started) - my 20th year is just around the corner.
seriously now, it depends on the couple. after 20 yrs sex can still be stimulating. just it gets like boring routine but it depends on how you are approach it. spice it up, sex it up, try different positions.
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A
female
reader, Olivia(Y).  +, writes (14 May 2009):
 No.. You can be sexualy active as long as you want to be.
Lots of people are sexualy active all their life.
Don't believe anything that you read, its not true. If you find each other attractive and want to do it then you are right?
Livia
xoxox
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