A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi guys, got a bit of a dilemma. Basically, me and my finacee have been together for about 2 years. We split up for a while about 3 months ago and the we reconciled. However, during this time she was involved with someone else. We have spoke about this and I have moved on from this. However, recently I have found out that she cheated on me 4 times before we split up. She has never mentioned this, and I can't confront her about this as I found through a bit of snooping. At the time she did this, we were going though a rough patch, but I never even considered she'd do this.How do I deal with this? Do I confront her? Do I let it go and realise it's in the past? And can I ever trust her again?Thank you for any advice you can give.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2010): confront her but in a grown up way. i no thats hard i hav been though it so many times but if you let it go it will eat at you for a very long time. ill tell you when i no from my exprace youll just wake up one day and not care. i wouldnt marry her untill you fell 100% trust and you can share ever thing. 4 times is nothing when it gets to doubles then its time to worry. talk to her so you no everything she could have been very confused and probable feels very bad about this. 12 is my unlucky number she cant be as bad as that i hope.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2010): If she cheated on you when the two of you were going through a rough spot in your relationship then this indicates a flaw in her character. And four times is not a mistake, it is a pattern. Do not marry her. She is not wife material. And yes confront even if she is angry that you snooped. If she breaks up with you over snooping you will be better off.
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