A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, there was this girl who pretty much in every single class that I'm in this semester. Throughout the semester, I noticed she's been behaving anomaly, things like:1) When class finished, I often stay back a minute or two to pack up my stuff and turn in my works, and she always lingered around until I leave.2) Because we sat next to each other in one of the class (I sat in the far left isle, while she sat next to my right), she tends to square her self toward me (cross her legs with the right foot pointed to my direction, lean her body and arm toward the left side)3) In lab, when she's finished she also lingered around to chat with other people in the class. Even when everyone left, she still wandered the hall outside by the time I leave.4) In another class she sat a row in front of me, more than often enough, I caught her turned her head, took a quick glance at me then turn her head back.5) On one of the occasion, it's look like she was about to start a small talk with me, but quickly divert her attention to another direction.Today was the final day of the semester, I made my move confronting her. Well, not face to face, but rather wrote her a note which included my phone number and tucked it under her car's windshield wiper. Over the next 3 hrs, I received 3-4 phone calls and 2-3 texts from an unknown number. I responded to the text, and it was her. In the initial notes that I left, IIRC correctly it said "I enjoyed her presence, it made my darkest hour such as this weary semester the happiest time of my life, I wish it won't stop anytime soon, if you feel the same as I felt about you, give me a respond at this #number". She then ask who am I, I slowly revealed my identity. 15 minutes after the last test with my name on it, she responded with "Sorry, I'm afraid I don't feel the same way about you."I'm actually fine with the rejection, I just don't understand her reasoning or the rationality of the situation. Because it's obviously, she already knew it was me all along (we sat next together, chances are she probably knew my handwriting). Plus, the constant callings and texts could indicated she was anxious to confirm her guts.I just couldn't understand what went wrong at all. I would be very grateful if anyone could give an insights from another point of view of the situation.Thank you in advance.
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female
reader, maisy1  +, writes (10 May 2013):
Hi,
A friend of mine had a note on her winscreen once and she thought she had a stalker! If you thought she liked you then asking her out face to face would have better. Leaving that type of note and then SLOWELY revealing your identity would have made her think she had someone playing games or stalking her.
In all honesty you would have sounded needy and OTT judging by the tone of your note. She may have been interested but asking her if she felt the same way (ie: if your presence had made her darkest hour the hapiest off her life) was always going to be a negative.
A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (10 May 2013):
 Its probably just a simple case of you reading the signs wrong. All of these behaviours you list, all could point towards one thing - was there someone else who used to stay late after class? Was there someone sitting near to you that she could have been turning to look at? You might think that she was interested in you, but if there was someone else around at the same time you were she might be interested in him!
If that's not the case, maybe she is interested in the teacher/lecturer that is teaching your classes, hence why she seems to be hanging around after classes on her own.
Either way, she has blown you off - I dont think you did anything particularly wrong, apart from the mention of your 'darkest hour' as that makes you sound clinically depressed and she will have been put off thinking you have some mental health issues that you are dealing with. No girl wants to know about your 'darkest hour' before you have even spoken properly, that was WAY too much information too soon.
Anyway regardless of what you did and what behaviour she was displaying, she is not interested so end of story. She probably thought it was another guy she likes so when she found out it was you she was disappointed hence why she told you she doesnt feel the same.
Move on, she doesnt want to know so forget about her and focus your attentions elsewhere.
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