A
female
age
51-59,
*aux
writes:Hi, it is a little bit long but I need your help !Question: should I contact him again and tell him that I am available for that lunch? should I wait to see if he contact me back? (which I do not think will happen) This is the story:I met a guy in MSN, we write very funny and interesting messages; he said he loved to talk to me and laugh a lot; he invited me twice and twice I said … no. First time was really not a good time and the second I just were stubborn enough to not cancel my swimming session to have lunch with him, that same day he contacted me to ask about the swimming pool and told me that he regretted that I did not joined him for lunch.I regretted too, as I sometimes cancel my swimming session for no particular reason, so why not to have lunch with a handsome funny guy? Anyway, next day I contact him and I felt that he just answer out of politeness so I stopped writing and he did the same; the day after I contacted him again and same result, so I stopped. A week just pass and I have no news. I feel that I screw up Do you think is lost?I will appreciate any advice, Men point of view? Thanks
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female
reader, laux +, writes (17 March 2009):
laux is verified as being by the original poster of the questionGood Girl and PeterPan, thanks for your answers !
Just to give you an update in case you are interested I was writing my email to propose him to go to see an improvisation theater troop (he said he like theater) when Surprise! he contact me back! and propose me a "crazy plan" (in his own words); he said "if I give you a place and date, would you accept to meet there and kiss each other before to talk?" I said yes, as long as after we take time to know each other (I thought it was romantic), he is surprise at the fact that I said yes.
We fix the date and the hour, he give me his cell phone and suddenly the emergency alarm of the building starts beeping (Believe or not! what a bad luck!) I knew it was an exercise so I fast write him I had to leave the building as an emergency evacuation exercise is going on, he laughs.
20 mins later, I am back at my desk (yes I was at work) and I write him back ... he never answers back.
As I had his cell phone, I send a message asking for the place of hour rendezvous ... and guess what? No answer at all and deep silence since then.
Therefore, I guess this time is really a dead end and I will just deal with that. As GoodGirl say maybe is just a little bit of the famous French "Go away, no come back".
By the way, I am Mexican, so not familiar with that :0(
Thanks anyway
A
female
reader, Good Girl  +, writes (15 March 2009):
 According to your flag, you are French, my mother was also. From my experience you are masters of "Go away, no come back." If you regret what you did, pester him a little. What you have done may only heighten the anticipation for him.
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A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (10 March 2009):
 Well, from my personal point of view, if I had asked a woman out twice for lunch and later found out that I was blown off for a swim in a pool... I'd probably feel rather superfluous and read that you were not really interested. And yes, I would politely answer your messages but might think that you're simply teasing me.
The only thing here might be to extend the offer for lunch yourself and hope that you catch him at a good time. If he doesn't reply or isn't available, he's probably assuming you're still playing games with him. Don't tell him you're available for lunch -- invite him to join you and not wait for him to ask you again. In other words, if you want to possibly salvage a good thing, you're going to have to take a more aggressive posture and extend the invitation rather than wait for one or tell him you're available for one.
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