A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 7 months. I have 2 problems. First problem is that even though I love him very much, I am afraid of what's going to happen with us. In my 3 past relationships, they have not lasted longer than a year and a couple months. Is this going to be the same thing, all over again?Second is really bad, I think. There is a guy I was already interested in before I got with my boyfriend, but he told me that we should be just friends. We are best friends.Two times recently he has lead me to believe he wants more, but then he acts like nothing happened. One day, a couple months ago, I had to get same day surgery at the hospital and told him I was scared and was joking with him and said, "What if I don't make it out? Do I at least get a good luck kiss?" He kissed me.Then, the same day, he grabbed my chest and asked if he could take a peek, since one day when I was joking around, I flashed him. He said he wanted to see more.I showed him. Then I said, "So, I show and get nothing in return? Are you scared?" Well, he showed. He hit on me all day. Then, the next day he was the same friend he ever was and acted like nothing happened.When I brought it up, he said he wasn't interested in a relationship or anything else because he was "Done". What the heck is that all about? He hit on me again 2 days ago asking for a picture of me topless, but I told him "No" and that I wasn't playing that game again. What should I do, to both problems?
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female
reader, Phoebe Halliwell  +, writes (19 August 2010):
 Hey :)
In answer to your first problem, none of us can tell you how long your relationship is going to last. We're not mind readers I'm afraid. All you can do is make sure you're enjoying your time together. If you give him no reason to want to leave, he'll most likely stay where he's happy, with you.
Your second problem is not as easy to answer. This guy just sounds like he wants all the fun bits of a relationship with none of the obligation. Just be friendly with him, be nice, but he's pushing it. Let him know you've got a boyfriend you love, and that you're not going to play games with him. This guy just sounds like toruble for you
Good luck!
xxx
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