A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've never done "it", but can "it" be used to control someone or a relationship? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, The old Man? +, writes (29 January 2009):
 I'm sorry for the misunderstanding!
By the tone of your e mail, I sense that there was some mis communication.
I just wanted to say that the way the question was posed It could be have been interpreted either way.
example,
1. Is this possible for someone to do this? Does it work?
or
2. You mean people actually try and control another with sex?
I answered both ways. I had a bad feeling about saying that, but when I read questions from people who are looking for devious methods or some form of justification for cheating, or how to steal away someones bf,gf wife or husband, I was just looking at it from all angles.
I'm sorry to have offended you.
Joe~
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOh and Joe, i don't do that stuff. I think guys are more likely to do that though.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you guys
-Anon25
25/f/US
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (29 January 2009):
 I'll agree with "The old Man?" Yes, sex can be used both ways in a controlling manner, but it is also known as "playing games." Both men and women have their needs for sexual satisfaction, which is innate. When either mate withholds sex for some kind of control, such as attempting to invoke some behavior or material acquisition that would otherwise not be forthcoming, then it is akin to bribery or blackmail.
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A
male
reader, The old Man? +, writes (28 January 2009):
Sex is too often used to control someone in a relationship.
Some females use it like a punishment/ reward, or as though it is some special "gift", and that she holds the "magic prize" Though men tend to want it more than women, women have to understand that they don't have the "only one" in town.
Sex should be a mutual thing, something that both want, agree upon and enjoy.
Another way it is used is if there is something she wants, she will use sex to get it. That's pretty slutty if you ask me!
The sad reality of using sex as a control mechanism is, it will lead to cheating. A guy will only put up with jumping through hoops for so long! Having to play some sort of game will wear thin, and it wont be long, and he will move on and find someone whom which he doesn't go through all of that with.
It may be cute and fun at first, watching him bow to your beck and call, but one day, you'll place a demand, and he's not going to care less if he gets it from you or not, cuz he's getting it elsewhere!
It's these girls that do this, then when their guy goes elsewhere, she stands there and says: "I can't believe he did that, that no good cheating bastard"!!!
He'll just reply with, "Sorry babe, but I got sick of your games"!
Don't try and control someone with sex. You may not like what happens!
Joe~
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A
female
reader, AperfectSchism +, writes (28 January 2009):
 Absolutely. It can only control someone, though, if they let it. Only you can control yourself and make decisions; no one else can tell you what you HAVE to do.
I hope this helped a bit.
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