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B.J's What else can we do, besides full sex?

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Question - (21 January 2008) 5 Answers - (Newest, 21 January 2008)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

my boyfriend loves b/j. and i want to do other things along with that. so what can we do other than have sex?

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A female reader, Devilish Angel United States +, writes (21 January 2008):

Devilish Angel agony auntSure, he loves a b/j but he needs to pleasure you too. Ask him to eat you out and touch you. Kiss him and touch him too. Sex should be 90% foreplay and 10% penetration.

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A male reader, daletom United States +, writes (21 January 2008):

First of all be totally in agreement on what will NOT happen, and under what circumstances you will move on to full penetrative sex. Make sure that both of you respect each other's limits, will help each other honor them, and won't take advantage of a situation.

I assume you have time - hours - that you can spend with each other in private.

Then - just explore and experiment. You both have hands, mouths, hair, tongues, various skin textures, etc. Find out what pleases you and what pleases your partner. It will probably change a bit from day to day, maybe even in the course of making love. At your age things might go better if you help your B/F to a quick climax early in the lovemaking (he's got to know it's going to happen and cooperate) and then play while he is in his re-charge time.

That is also a good thing to do when you have your first intercourse. He will be much less rushed, have better control, and respond better to your needs.

Remember this is something you are doing WITH someone, not doing TO someone, or someone doing to YOU. BOTH of you need to be using feedback and direction. Both of you should be saying things like "I want a kiss that lasts at least 10 seconds!" or "I'm not ready for you to do that yet." or "I need your help to keep our promise.". Both of you should be taking hands and placing them where you want to be touched (or moving them from where you don't), and demonstrating the rhythm and firmness you want. And both of you should be using vocalizations and body movements to show when something is pleasing.

If it hasn't happened yet, you two should learn how to bring you to orgasm. A LOT of girls have their first climax while their thighs are wrapped around a B/F's ears.

I hope this learning period lasts for weeks or even several months. Many couples have used these activities very successfully as a substitute for intercourse when they weren't ready for penetrative sex, then discovered that they were very good things to know after they added intercourse to their relationship. You will be learning to make love - which is a lot broader, more pleasurable, and more satisfying than simply having sex.

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A female reader, xapathyxrebornx United Kingdom +, writes (21 January 2008):

xapathyxrebornx agony aunthmmm you could give him a hand job or try dry humping (non penatrive sex with clothes on) hmmmm the choice is yours =]

make sure you get pleasure too though!

message me if you want to talk x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2008):

I am going to assume that you are talking sexual kinds of things and not other activities like listening to music or watching a movie. For my wife and I, sometimes the best part of having sex is the snuggling, cuddling and fondling. Lying in bed or sitting on the couch and just touching and kissing each other is great. Maybe just being undressed from the waist up will help prevent it from going to actual sex and allow you to concentrate on the pleasure of just the feel of each others bodies. Things like him standing behind you and gently rubbing your boobs, tummy and sides and kissing your shoulders, neck and ears.

You say that he likes you to give him oral sex. Does he do the same for you? If not, why not? He should be as good to you as you are to him.

If this is not what you had in mind then please be a little more specific. Have fun.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2008):

well there a lot u 2 can do.fondle each other.give him a hand job, jerk him off rubbing his by your feet, better still between ur boobs. let him suck ur pussy as u suck his dick.with some lubrication and a condom on ,let him into ur anus. keep experimenting and in 3 months u would add many more to this list. the joy of body exploration is an ocean. please have bath before sex, avoid perfumes and wash after sex.go explore.

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