A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my friend are going through a rough spell the now. A cupple of years ago she got a new boyfriend and we slowly started to drift apart, we ended up arguing and i lost her for about a year. She came to me and told me she was havin trouble with her boyfriend and we started to be friends and she stopped going with him.Since then we have been closer than ever, we did everything together, i have had the best year of my life with her. But now she has a new boyfriend and its happening all over again :( i dont want to say to her incase she thinks im acting petty or over reacting but i dont want to lose her again, she means to much to me.Her new boyfriend dose drugs and im just worried she will start and ill lose her forever. She has already made a name for herself and i dont want her to get worse.Has anyone any ideas of what i could do or could say ?? Please help xx
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female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (13 June 2009):
 I know it really hurts to watch your friend screw up her life, but you've got to let her do it. You can always support her when she needs it, listen to her when she needs to talk, help her out if she asks, but that's all. If you love your friend, you've got to let her be free no matter how much you don't want you. She might resent you for interfering in her life and push you farther away.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut i cant let her go when i know what hes like, if anything had to happen i could never forgive my self if i had the chance to do something about it.
I dont want to conrol my friendship, i just want to help my friend! she means to much to me to lose her
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (9 June 2009):
You can't save her from herself. Let her go, if you are a good friend to her your friendship will go on.It seems like you have some codependency issues yourself, since you want to control what type of relationship she's in and what kind of behavior she does.
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