A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my partner for 4 years. We are both females and is the first same sex relationship either of us have had. A year ago I would have said I love her more than anything but now im not so sure. I have had alot on my mind recently. Im also thinking about the future e.g. marriage and kids. I am having very mixed feelings and am very confused. Sometimes I think maybe we were just friends but got a little too close. I dont think I am a lesbian as I only find men attractive. Please help me as i am so confused.
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female
reader, howcomehoney  + ♥, writes (22 May 2007):
 Maybe the relationship is just winding itself down. If a year ago you were madly in love with her, this probably isn't due to your sexuality (otherwise you would never have loved her in that way). But when the passion dies out, you start asking yourself questions and looking for reasons.
If you're unhappy with her, talk to her about it. Try to find out the problem in your relationship - lack of attention, lack of conversation, financial problems etc. Work on it. If you can't work on it, maybe you won't stay together. Afterwards you can think about your sexuality and maybe you'll start dating a man... or maybe another woman. Who can see the future?
Is it the family thing that scares you? Lesbian couples have children all the time! I hope you manage to work it out and find out what's best for you.
A
female
reader, raynbopyde637  +, writes (18 May 2007):
 that hurts, its possible i mean women do connect on a totally different level then men and women. and at times women become to comfortable with there partner, rather than being in love. but as far as not being a lesbian, think to yourself is there other things that keep you happy wih her, she take care of you? great friends? keeps you happy? things like that, can make you feel like shes the one, female or male, four years is a really long time. regardless of what u do..be honest with yourself and your partner. hurts but in the end its worth it. you deserve to be with someone who loves you and u love and so does she.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2007): If you only find men attractive then you're probably not a lesbian.
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