A
female
age
51-59,
*ndSxy2
writes:I have been dating this guy for seven months now. We, supposedly, are just friends. He suggested that we do not date anyone else, a monogamous relationship, but we are just friends. We do love each other. We use to go to Church and his friends functions together until they started asking him about a committment to me. He basically cut me off from meeting and greeting any of his family and friends. He expects me to spend all of my free time with him, which I have been doing. When I make a comment about a commitment, he totally shuts down. When I ask about his love for me, he doesn't want to discuss it, but tells me daily that he loves me. I am in love with him, but I really need to know if I am being played as a fool? Should I let go of this so called friendship even if it will hurt me? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (20 April 2011):
 Well at least he is being open with you and telling you that you are only friends even though you both dont see anybody else. It sounds to me like this man may have a phobia of committment. Has he been hurt or cheated on in the past? That would make him lose trust for women?
It sounds to me like he doesnt want to accept that he is in a relationship for whatever fears he has. This is what you need to get to the bottom of. Sit him down and talk to him. Tell him you are not going to make him do anything he doesnt want to do but ask him to open up to you and explain to you why he wont open up. You deserve to know. Goodluck Darling.
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