A
female
age
36-40,
*ashful567
writes:I have a beautiful 12 month daughter and a wonderful husband which happens to be in Iraq right now. Since i had my daughter my self-esteem has been terrible. I went from 95lbs to 210lbs. I have now gotten down to 128 but as much weight as i have lost it hasn't help my self-esteem at all. My husband just recently come home for his R and R and i couldn't even get naked in front of him. I have had eating problems in the past and i am scared they might reoccur. I have done everything from going to the gym, tanning, running, you think of it- i've done it. Can someone PLEASE help me or give advice on how i can boost my self-esteem enough to get naked in front of my husband once again.
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female
reader, Bashful567 +, writes (14 June 2007):
Bashful567 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank You all!
A
reader, I Dont Lie +, writes (14 June 2007):
 Self esteem issues are all about believing in yourself. If you have high self esteem, you can go out wearing just a scarf and still think you're going to be the next trend setter. Most people usually only have self confidence if they think they are pretty, of correct weight, in other words feel happy and comfortable with themselves.
You feel you still have a weight problem when really you dont. Its the obsession of once becoming a bigger lady when you were pregnant. You need to embrace that image of the pregnant lady you once were, realise that its a beautiful thing to have had your daughter inside of you for those 9 months. Realise that its just a phase you go through when you're pregnant and that you are not stuck with that size forever. Realise that you have lost 82lbs in just a year, and realise how much more weight you could shed given time, if you wanted. Most importantly, realise that you have the power to look whatever way you want, when you want, and in that, you have gotten yourself a beautiful child and a lovely husband.
Try looking at this at different perspectives, one angle is to notice how confident some actually larger women who have got confidences. And think, if they can actually do it, why cant you when you arent even big at all. Good luck and remember its all in the mind.
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (14 June 2007):
 How about dressing up for your husband rather than getting completely naked?
I had an eating disorder in my teens and am scared I will fall back in to old habits. It's hard work some days but I used to see a psychologist once a week and she was a great help. I'm not the most confident person either and just talking about this with her made me realise that my low confidence is just the way I am and she helped me cope with it and slowly it is improving.
What has your husband said about how you feel? maybe talking to him will help a little. If he knows how you feel about him not seeing your body he may be able to help.
Good luck!
xxxxxxxxxx
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