A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well I finally got this girl's phone number who I've had a crush on for more than 2 years... I said we should "catch up" and I'll call her. I know what I can say when I do call her, but I was wondering if someone had any input in this?
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male
reader, WastedLife +, writes (8 May 2008):
I agree with Jen86, but with one proviso. Women seem to know what "be yourself" means, but almost no guys know or understand. If a guy is a trekkiegeek, being "yourself" does not mean being trekkiegeek. It means something else. Perhaps the women could add to this.
It seems that being friendly and easygoing(easier said than done - gets better with practice) and leading her to mention her interests and letting her talk on these, and agreeing mostly is a good start. If you can, mention something real that will trigger strong positive emotions that you agree on(Can you imagine being this kitten that fell of the roof of this building, but by some miracle it landed on an awning and was safe, isn't that amazing?). That kind of emotional agreement can lead to good feelings and "we have things in common". Whatever you do, keep things light, and don't press or obsess if she seems indifferent. That way, you have another chance later. Good luck.
A
male
reader, WastedLife +, writes (7 May 2008):
Be friendly and as relaxed as possible. Feel excited about life and have something exciting you think would be cool for the two of you to do. If she seems OK with the idea, then suggest a time, as "let's meet at (somewhere) and go to (somewhere else) and do (something). Be flexible - if she says something, let the conversation get deflected there. Try for common things you can agree on - build agreement, not debate or difference. Practice makes better, and just ignore any flops. If you say something way out of line and she freaks, just say sorry - and find your way back to common ground. Plan to end the conversation before she does, so she will still feel excited, not bored. Good luck.
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