A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Recently, my boyfriend has started getting closer to one of his friends. Let's call him Tom. After learning that he was accepted to med school, Tom decided to throw a party at a 21+ bar. He invited my bf but since I am not 21, I was not able to attend.The next day, as my bf was telling me about the party, I noticed that he kept going back to the subject of Tom's new girlfriend. Now, Tom hasn't had a girlfriend in years because he is always so focused on school. Anyway, my bf kept telling me about how she was all over him and how she was so cute and so smart. He even asked Tom if they wanted to go on a double date sometime... which is weird because he's usually not into that kind of thing. Today, as we were leaving a restaurant, my bf and I ran into Tom and his gf. We hastily greeted them because my bf was in a hurry to get to class. As we were walking out of the restaurant, once again, my bf started to go on and on about how surprising it was that she waved first and how he was so surprised to even see them blah blah blah...So what is up with this? Should I be worried or am I just over-thinking this whole thing? Please help! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (12 April 2011):
 Don't worry, at least not yet. It's been a couple of meetings, and he is surprised and happy for his friend. Maybe even a little shocked that he was able to catch a nice lady? I know this is a silly example, but imagine if Tom had gotten a new car instead of a new gf, and this car was so cool, and great and whatnot and your bf kept talking about it in the same way. Would that make you nervous? Would that make you think "oh no now he wants to buy the same car for himself!", or something?
I think your bf is just happy to meet another interesting person. Imagine if Tom was a girl and just got herself a new boyfriend and your boyfriend talked about him that same way... would you assume he was gay? Nah, for now I think this just shows how cool he thinks this new girl is and how happy he is for his friend Tom to finally meet someone. Perhaps even because he himself feels so grateful for having you that he is happy to see his friend get someone of an equal standard or something.
I think you are being protective over your territory like any girlfriend who adores and loves her man will be. Just keep it in check and don't act out on it.
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