A
female
age
36-40,
*neshotofblonde
writes:okay, this is awful. i've posted my "issue" previously some many months ago. but i can't seem to get over it.i wrote previously that i had developed certain feelings for my boss, which had gone beyond just boss and subordinate. he's married, and with kids, and when i first liked him, it was because i was getting a lot of mixed signals from him. i know he tends to be the playful type - the type who can say a lot of things (especially in a big group or in front of a lot of other people) to a girl, and have a big laugh about it. so it's hard to tell sometimes if there even is a hidden meaning. i also know if a guy really likes someone, they're likely to be very vocal about it. but it doesn't matter, i realise, the signals he gives off, because i've come to find myself liking him anyway. i actually pushed him out of my head for really long, and decided to give less of myself and time to his requests at work (its not neglecting work but more like sometimes he needs favours, now i just take it less seriously). i've even turned all my focus on my boyfriend (whom i actually love very much).i know there's a difference between love and a crush. in love, you care and adore for that person no matter what. but there's a little less of that passion which you get from a crush. sigh, so it's different. it hasn't really changed my priorities or perceptions.i've even stopped hanging around with him after work. previously, my colleagues and i would hang out in a group, with him included. now a days i don't even ask him anymore, and have put more of my time to be with my other colleagues. well, i guess pushing and distancing ourselves does help physically, but mentally/emotionally, i care very much for him.lately, i've been dreaming of him a lot. it's tiring and emotionally draining, because i wake up hating myself for recharging those feelings i have for him again. help please. i do want to get over this, it's getting me no where.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (22 March 2010):
 It's hard to get rid of a crush when the object of your affection is in your face everyday. You are doing the right thing by keeping your distance as much as you can. Redirect you thoughts whenever you start thinking about the boss. And by all means try to stay focused on your boyfriend, he's the real deal.
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