A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I found out that my bf's best friend, the one i don't like, is doing drugs.. and it's not an easy drug, it's a heavy drug... It's speed.. Some of his other friends are sniffing too.. Now, my boyfriend has lied to me before, about pot.. But i eventually gave in, so he does it, and i know about it.. The problem is, He swears to me that he does not do it, and he tells me that i can check it if i want to.. you know, with tests.. And he tells me that he knows that it is bad, and he has this whole act, about him hating the fact that his friends are using.. But they see each other all the time... And i don't know what to think... I mentioned that i don't trust him and that i think that he is doing it.. Then he raised his voice and shouted at me, bringing back the discussion about me drinking about five months ago, saying that he doesn't do drugs... Now, he is normally that easy tempered, but i don't know if it's because he defends himself by charging me, or what? I am so afraid that he is using.. I love him so much, but i can't stay in that kind of relationship... :( That would be more than i can handle... And now i just don't know what to do... should i break up with him? is he really doing it or not? and i've heard before.. Addicts are great liars... I know that he loves me... I don't know if i should stay with him even if he is doing it, and try to get him out of it.. ? i don't know what to do... someone please help me, i'm desperate...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): lol @ the anon males views. very witty and also very true. made me think anyway.
A
male
reader, faenon  +, writes (16 January 2011):
 You say yourself dont want to be in a relationship with a guy who uses yet his crowd of friends are users birds of a feather stick together. If your not happy with his choice of friends and cant be honest leave I'm same as you in that mindset addicts are a waste of oxygen and best left to their own accord find yourself a clean lad to be happy with if you arent happy with this current bf.
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A
male
reader, eddie85  +, writes (16 January 2011):
 I'll be honest, birds of a feather flock together.
Is your boyfriend doing speed? Maybe. If you notice your boyfriend acting outrageous or unable to sleep or not accountable for his time, then he's probably involved with it. It's a very addictive drug and tough to quit from all that I've read.
Yes, you are correct, addicts are great liars and they'll tell tall tales so that they can continue to do their drugs. With your boyfriend's past indiscretions with pot, I think the writing is on the wall. At your age, you need to decide if you are content dating a frat boy and if you want any potential children you have with him raised in this sort of environment.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): Why are you with someone you don't trust? You say addicts are great liars so why are you so unrealistic that a drug user will be honest with you?
You can only accept someone as they are, not what you want them to be. If you don't want to be with a guy who does drugs then make the decision not to be and follow through with it. Don't expect him to make that choice for you. He is with someone who doesn't do drugs and he's fine with that so no reason for him to make changes.
It seems you are avoiding having to make a decision and instead placing that burden on him to quit so you don't have to be responsible for your own happiness.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): Amphetamines are not addictive,no more addictive than coffee,nagging your partner,chocolate or weed. The most addictive drugs are sold in shops legaly in packs of 10 or 20. They are very expensive and addicts tend to say "I can quit anytime" or "I`m not quitting you only live once" but like you mentioned,addicts are great liars. Also be on guard of the less but still can be addictive alcohol,known to cause mindless violence and so dangerous that it trebles street violence,death behind steering wheels and is a burden and enemy of what could have been a happy family. Not to mention making an idiot of yourself. Known to add false courage and helps shy men to compliment females. Also it can make anything female seem very attractive,and be the cause of many regrets,if you can remember that is. The odd ones do go on to become addicted.
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