A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating my ex best friends ex boyfriend for about 3 months now and I an still insecure that he will leave me and go back to her. Her and I have not been friends for nearly 5 years now and her and my now boyfriend dated for the last 5 years that we have not been friends. How do i get over this?? He never wants to talk about her, and i think that is why I am so insecure, but he truly shows me how much he loves me everyday.
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best friend, his ex, insecure, my ex Reply to this Question |
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): Just be yourself, what else can you do. If he doesnt talk about her, isnt that good. You dont want him chattering on about her all the time do you. But i think he is in the rebound time and you are wise to be cautious. Why did you and her fall out? Remember the saying, keep your friends close, but your enemies closer. So, if in the future she does become a pain, then could you not become friends with her? It is an idea. But for now just keep on being yourself and try not to become paranoid about the whole thing.
take care
xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2008): Wow. I too would feel insecure for a couple really obvious reasons. A) He only just got out of a 5 year relationship. He's probably still rebounding. And B) Of all people to go out with, you are his ex's ex best friend. There is a big possibility he might be trying to make her jealous. And the fact that he never wants to talk about her kind of just adds to this argument.
Given these circumstances I cannot blame you in the least for feeling totally weird and skeptical about this. But I think that if something is meant to be, it will work out and you don't have to force it much. So just relax and enjoy your relationship and time will tell if this is just a rebound for him or if this is the real thing between you two.
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A
female
reader, Annalisa  + ♥, writes (19 February 2008):
 If they broke up just before you got together with him, there is probably still a sore place in his heart, where the love for her turned sour and it'll take a while for it to be expiated.
What were their reasons for breaking up?
How did you two get together?
Are you afraid you are a rebound rather than true love?
Maybe, but if he's truely happy with you and you love each other, there's no reason for him to go back to her.
If your doubt is inplacable still, talk to him and tell him you need to discuss their break up, so you can be sure she's out of the picture for good.
If he says there's no need, because he's in love with you, then let it rest!
Unfortunately, this gelousy often comes from knowing your partner has loved someone else before you and in today's world it's just something you'll have to deal with.
God bless and good luck!
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A
female
reader, blacksoul  +, writes (19 February 2008):
 well you may try to be diffrent than her c whats not in her and do it like being more attractive than her and try to make him intersted in your talk and thoughts also your always new look . that he will never think to get apart of u, also dont be available for him all time , just make your self mysterious to occupy his mind always , u may act sad for a day and he works hard to know the reason then u act very good and nice with him in another day .
i mean u should attract him by all mean that he cant leave you ever , also try to join an activity and being with a group of people which make him alwys feel jealousy on you.
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