A
female
age
51-59,
*rettywoman
writes:I have a problem with starting relationships. I get chatted up and stuff, but I'm just not interested in case I get hurt (again!). How can I stop this negative way of thinking, and start enjoying dating again? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, huneygyrl  +, writes (17 June 2007):
 I totally understand how you feel. It sucks but we have to take chances in life and starting a relationship is one of them. We are taking the chances of whether or not our heart is going to shatter to pieces. Just be alert. When "red flags" are thrown up, don't ignore it.
When dating, it's not like you're commited into a relationship overnight. You're just starting a fresh. Just don't open up and give your heart to quickly. Just get to know the person before deciding whether or not if he's the one for you. You are in control of your feelings and decisions. Just be careful.
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (17 June 2007):
 YOU are in charge of what happens in any relationship, just remember that. You've been hurt in the past and you have a wall up when chatting to the opposite sex. Just try and relax more, enjoy their company and get to know them as a FRIEND before going out on an actual date with them. As you get to know a guy better you'll come to build up a trust in him, tell him about your past hurts and how you're terrified of being hurt again, if he likes you then he'll respect that and he'll go at your pace.
Eve
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