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... Send *ddie a private message | | | *ddie's profile:Hi there. I go by Eddie. I'm from Canada. I have a great wife and two great kids, both teenagers. I've been with my wife for 21 years and we dated for two years before that.
I enjoy travel and learning new things. Different cultures interest me and what makes them tick. I think there is always a reason for the way certain cultures do things and many times we are too quick to judge things that we find odd.
The more places I go and the more people I meet, the more I see that we are so similar. Everybody is trying to enjoy life but we are all influenced along the way by the stuff that "happens". The trick is to learn from the lessons and carry on. I have a short fuse for infedility and take marriage very seriously. It's not from personal experiences either. I just don't understand why people don't seem to fix the problems in their marriages before they create more. I see lots of questions on this site pertaining to this topic, that's why I added this part. |
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| Latest articles: Why do people think the unattached person in a love triangle is a victim?
This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 September 2007: Why is it that people get involved in love triangles and feel rejected when they don't work out? Why do so many agony aunts treat the third member of the triangle as a victim? I'm tired of hearing people reccommend.... "distance yourself from hi...
Fidelity and marriage
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 May 2007: Many times, we see questions asking for advice about marriage, monotony and fidelity. I tend to be cut and dry on this topic and often without compassion for the person struggling in this area. What bothers me most, is the ability of people to ...
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Is a piece of very expensive clothing, a much too personal to give someone else's husband?
Q. I am married to a very handsome and successful man. A neighbor, newly single, gave us gifts at Christmas that were larger than I expected. They gifts for me were items for the house (the price stickers were highlighted so I suspect that they were ...
A. 30 January 2007: You might be reading too much into it. Maybe she is just a nice person. Leaving the price tags on the gift is a little strange. I know sometimes, at least in Canada, when something is reduced in price, they stroke through or circle the original ... (read in full...)
Two of my closest friends hooked up with my ex... multiple times!
Q. I just got the biggest shock of perhaps my entire life tonight. Two of my closest friends on the planet hooked up with my ex-girlfriend, several times over the past year. I knew that this girl had issues, but I still loved her, and even though I ...
A. 30 January 2007: It sounds like ther three of them are messed up. What would push her to sleep with so many of your inner circle of friends? That is strnage and says alot about her character. Not to mention the guys.... (read in full...)
She flirts in chat and on texts and takes stuff from me...is it time to call it a day??
Q. Lately (my now ex fiance)was calling me by a different name several times daily. I since found she`s yet again been flirting in chatrooms and also now by text.When asked about it, she automatically turned on me, and as usual got angry and started ...
A. 30 January 2007: You have every right to invade her privacy, if her private life includes being unfaithful to you. That's possibly why she's defensive.....because you caught her. She either frowns and says sorry or goes on the attack and syas you're the bad one.
... (read in full...)
Any insight into my "bus" dream?
Q. just a question about dreams for experts or people who know about it, I often dream I go in abus and get confused and never get to the place I'm supposed to or I'm late for the bus and get it on a strange place and I'm taken to a different stop to ...
A. 30 January 2007: I think I've heard that it is stress or something of that nature. I've had the one where I was running and couldn't get away for who was chasing me. I've also had the dream where I wasn't prepared for a test in school or didn't have a major part ... (read in full...)
I feel like I've been forgotten by my girlfriend... should I just end it?
Q. latley My girlfriend hasn't been acting the same. She just got back last week from us being a apart for a month. She went home for break. For the past week I feel like i've been forgotten. She doesn't call, or talk to me. It used to be that ...
A. 30 January 2007: You've been going out for a year. One rough week and you want to pack it in? THAT doesn't make sense. Just talk to her. There might be something else bothering you. ... (read in full...)
How do I know if she's also from the isle of lesbos?
Q. I am married. However I am attracted to women also. My husband knows about this. Of course it "turns" him on. I have a new friend that I just met who is also married. I would like to do something sexual with her but I don't know if she likes women ...
A. 30 January 2007: I don't think you're looking for a friend as much as hunting for a partner. If you knew this person would never have sex with you, would you still want to spend time with her. This obvioulsy is preoccupying your mind about her. It's hard to be a ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend won't reveal his sexual fantasies to me!
Q. I need help on getting my bf to open up sexually! My bf and I have been dating for quite some time. We are both mature adults, have both been married before, so it's not like we are inexperienced, but his timid sexual habits are driving me crazy...
A. 29 January 2007: You sound like you're totally fulfilled sexually, on your end. Why badger him about things he's not complaing about. Some people just don't like to discuss those things or put less importance on them. ... (read in full...)
Hubby is a good provider but lacks in the 'lovin'' departmenr. What can I do?
Q. You see, my husband has a type A personality and generally lives and breaths new ways to make money. Sex is my call 99% of the time and when we do get into it in the bedroom he always throws off this (yeah come n get it) vibe, which is the reason ...
A. 27 January 2007: Sometimes people need a wake up call. Tell him again. Go see a therapist, as a couple. Get another ear to hear your problems, not family though. If nothing else works, tell him how much youlove him but your leaving. Tell him your giving him ... (read in full...)
He loves BJ's and I hate giving them! How do I tell him without losing him?
Q. hi iam 35 and waited my whole life to meet a man like this,that treats me like gold,only problem is he loves blow jobs and i hate it so much,how do i explain to him with out loosing him....
A. 27 January 2007: Well, that's a difficult one. You could just come out and tell him. If I were you, I 'd try and figure out a way to learn to at least be able to get through it. It's all in the mind. Figure out what part bothers you the most and try to deal with ... (read in full...)
I left my wife for another girl, but the other girl now refuses to give up her "lifestyle!"
Q. I recently left my wife, for a girl, I have been having an affair with for two years. she always promised to move to my part of the country, as I have children. Now, she refuses, because she can't bear to give up her life or lifestyle. This...
A. 27 January 2007: Tooooooo Bad for you :( What comes round goes around.... (read in full...)
I really want to experience some girl on girl action, but my boyfriend doesn't want to take part. Should I cheat on him?
Q. Ok..i feel embarassed to be asking advice online so its a good think u don't know who a I am lol.. anyways.. so i am 20 something and I'm straight in a healthy commited relationship. I have no complaints about our sex life.. but here i am ...
A. 25 January 2007: I don't think anybody has really picked up on the point his woman enjoys sex with other women. It's something she's done in the past and still desires. As far as I know, that is bi sexual. She states she doesn't think she's bi. IF it's not bi, ... (read in full...)
Do you think he's been cheating with the girl from his 3-week training couse?
Q. I am unsure whether to trust my boyfriend of one year. I knew about my boyfriend before we started seeing each other and I know he has cheated on one girlfirend with someone from Spain and dumped the English Girlfriend eventually to get together ...
A. 24 January 2007: His actions mean nothing in particular. They could mean either. I would say people tend to let their guard down a little while away. We're out of our environment and having some fun. We mix socially and do things, not bad things, we might not ... (read in full...)
My husband and I are perfect, except for the sex. He said I could have other partners so long as I came back to him... but now I've fallen in love with one!
Q. Please can you offer me some advice. I am married and have been with my husband for 5 years. We have one 2 year old boy and I am 6 weeks pregnant with our second child. We are happy together and we are made for each other but he just does not do i...
A. 24 January 2007: Well, it seems your husband was way to giving. His logic doesnt' seem rational to me. He gave up way too early, as did you. You're also chasing something that is more an illusion than a long trerm reality. ASk yourself, what have you done to fix ... (read in full...)
I think my bf didn't want me to meet his friend b/c he did something he wasn't supposed to while on a trip.
Q. Am i being paranoid.. my b/f went on a trip last year for a week..he said he hung out with mostly with this one guy from work and this other guy..a lot of the other guys are older...but recently one of the older guys calling to go ride motorcycles...
A. 24 January 2007: You're digging a DEEEEEEEEP hole. "What if they go away again?" That is big what if. By the way, there are amillion others too. Pick another to worry about. It is endless. You trust him or you don't. I know it's easier said than done but if ... (read in full...)
Besotted with this other woman because of boredom in my marriage! What should I do?
Q. Hi. I am in a bit of a muddle - not sure whether it is fate or love... I am 21 and have been married for 1 year and been with my wife for 6. She was the first love of my life, and I seriously have never taken my eyes off her! However, a girl...
A. 24 January 2007: Melschatbox is correct. What happens when the next attractive woman comes your way? Relationships are about so much more than attraction. You're so green with the one you have that you haven't let the glue harden yet.
Time, memories, dreams ,... (read in full...)
I really want to experience some girl on girl action, but my boyfriend doesn't want to take part. Should I cheat on him?
Q. Ok..i feel embarassed to be asking advice online so its a good think u don't know who a I am lol.. anyways.. so i am 20 something and I'm straight in a healthy commited relationship. I have no complaints about our sex life.. but here i am ...
A. 24 January 2007: What makes you think you're not bi? You've been with a woman before and you'd like to again. You still like sex with men too. I'm not sure but that sounds like bi to me.... (read in full...)
Husband or my long love? What do I do?
Q. Married for 11 yrs, been in love with another man for 29yrs, he lives 1,800 miles away. Went to see him after 10yrs of not seeing each other and he tells me that he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me. He's everything I ever ...
A. 24 January 2007: I hope you never have an accident.... (read in full...)
Another guy walked in on us having sex and joined in. I told him to leave and he wouldn't! Is this rape?
Q. Ok. i have been thinking. I went to a bar a while ago and eneded up going home with a guy i knew of from high school. well we were having sex and another guy popped in and began messing with me as well. I didnt want this other guy there at all. but ...
A. 23 January 2007: I read your original post and your second reply. You have a problem here. There will be your version of what happened and his. No means no ! Without questiion. You hurt your case though by remaining in that situation. It hurts your ... (read in full...)
My guy on the side makes me feel special even though he only wants to have sex with me in the car. What should I do?
Q. I am having a affiar with a 26 year old man. He has a girlfriend and two kids. I have a bf of 3 years i luv him to bits, but he doesnt make me feel special any more and the 26 year old does. Even tho he is just wantin sex i still enjoy being with...
A. 18 January 2007: You are being cheap and shallow.... (read in full...)
We split and he said never to contact him again. I want to apologize, but also feel he over-reacted - what should I do?
Q. I split with my boyfriend just before Christmas. I did love him, but didn't feel that 'butterflies' thing that I have had with previous boyfriends. He was a recovering alcoholic (though he had not drunk for two and a half years) and he had declared ...
A. 18 January 2007: You told him that historically, you're a cheater. More than once I might add. You come back from vacation with your guy. You still want to meet up with another. Some guy from work is sending you sexy texts. You lied and met up with an ex who ... (read in full...)
My fiance arranged a meeting for he and I without consulting me first. It seems my opinion doesn't matter. Am I wrong to feel hurt and upset by this?
Q. im currently engaged to my fiance of 4yrs,lately hes been distant,i believed we had a good relationship until the other day when he decided to arrange a meeting and agreed,he consulted me after he`d done this,am i wrong to be hurt and upset that he ...
A. 17 January 2007: What do you mean..... he arranged a meeting? It sounds more like a busness arrangement.... (read in full...)
How do I stop having a crush on my husband's cousin - I'm not sure how I'll act once I've had a drink around him!
Q. I'm just really looking for some advice. I'n not sure whether I am in love with my husbands cousin or whether it's just a schoolgirl like crush on him. I have only been married to my husband for almost a year and have a young daughter, but I ...
A. 17 January 2007: Just act like the mother/adult you are and BEHAVE yourself. Is that not possible? What's the alternative? Drop your pants and jump him? I mean, we're supposed to be able to control our lustful desires. They will pass. Just imagine him with ... (read in full...)
He's asking me to chip in when I get a full time job... feel slightly put-out by this, but should I?
Q. I have been with my b/f for almost 2 years. He has paid for mostly everything. I pay for things here and there but its mostly him who pays if we go to a movie or to dinner or to a bar or for take out. I work part time b/c i am a full time student. ...
A. 17 January 2007: You're wrong about one thing...you do seem selfish and WAY out of line. Why on earth should he be responsible for your needs and bills. This is totally unbelievable.
What you've said is when you're married it's money earned together so you s... (read in full...)
Can guys sleep with girls and not get emotionally attached?
Q. I have been sleeping with a guy whos one of my friends, its been going on for a few months now, most weekends that we go out together he ends up at my house. At first i was ok about it, because i had just come out of a long relationship and it was ...
A. 17 January 2007: YES... (read in full...)
I find my husband-to-be an irritating little nerd... give me a wake-up call
Q. I find my bloke an irritating little nerd! Honestly, we are getting married in 8 weeks time and he gets on my nerves. He picks at my son (aged 15). States all the jobs he is 'going to do' and nothing gets done. He works shifts and sometimes we don't ...
A. 17 January 2007: Well it's safe to say you're not thinking positively. You'd better talk to the nerd and see what he thinks. He mught have a name of two for you. One might start with a B. Your attitude sucks. Get a new strategy.... (read in full...)
My parents were pissed off when they found I paid my own way, with this guy on our first date. Did they over-react?
Q. I am 18 and I have been in a relationship with the same guy for over four years now. My parents have known about the relationship the whole time, but have never let me actually go on a date until I turned 18. Anyway, now that I am 18, my parents l...
A. 17 January 2007: NOBODY should ever assume to be paid for. It is your own responsability to pay your own way. Should someone choose to treat you to something and desire to pay, that's fine. You should return the favour though. It's really none of your parents ... (read in full...)
I'm attracted to my co-worker, we are both married but I care for her and I'm not sure if she feels the same. Any thoughts?
Q. I have a co-worker that her and I are attracted to each other. We are both married, she's actually my co-owners sister-in-law. She likes older men, I'm 33, and I like younger women, she's 25. We have messed around a few times, but nothing major, ...
A. 17 January 2007: You made your own problems and now yo want suggestions on how to make them worse? Focus on the home fire. You've got your priorities in the wrong order.... (read in full...)
I'm married but my male friend confessed he had feelings for me. I haven't heard from him for a while. Do you think its over with he and I?
Q. Hi there, I've been happily married for 10 years. I recently met a really nice guy who i thought would make a good friend. We have been chatting a bit; he calls to my place of work to see me (i work in a public building). He doesn't text or ...
A. 17 January 2007: You sound confused and ready to take a step over the edge. You're leading yourself down the path that so many people do. People often try to put themselves above temptation. You're showing all the signs of somebody who's soaking up attention from ... (read in full...)
Am I being petty? Tell me what you think.
Q. Hi. Am i being petty? I went with my partner to his works do on saturday night. We went last year and it was fantastic, he was so attentive to me. We have been together now 20months and engaged. Well, a woman who he gets on well at work sat on our ...
A. 17 January 2007: It seems you are the jealous type under certain conditions. What he told you makes perfect sense. You over reacted and almost created an embarrassing scene. It's possible you actually did. You're over analizing this.... (read in full...)
My partner is so preoccupied with his child (from a previous marrige). I feel neglected, should I leave him?
Q. My partner has a child from a previous marriage, although I have always felt left out whenever the child came to stay things have become worse just recently. We have been together for 3 years despite this there isnt one photo of me in his flat (we ...
A. 16 January 2007: The problem is yours. You're trying to compete with a child. Picture that. You're getting tied up in knots because of a competition with a kid. The worst part is this, if you win, that makes your boyfriend a bad parent! That is his flesh and ... (read in full...)
Why would he say that if he's not hiding something?
Q. IM not sure what to think,ive been with my fella for 4 years and its not been plain sailing,but we always seem to sort out our diffrences and make up,these last few months have been diffrent hes been distant and arrogant towards me,without ...
A. 15 January 2007: OK, his sone told someone his dad was out. He was actually at home so this makes him a cheater. Are you assuming this was code language for the lover on the other end of the phone call. You'll never know but you'll continue to assume the worst ... (read in full...)
Worried that my boyfriend will be getting up to no good - strip clubs, kissing other girls or breaking up with me!
Q. I always feel like my bf is doing something bad when i can't find him, i dont' like the thought of him going to strip clubs or clubbing, he said he wouldn't go so i don't know, he's in canada right now. I got mad at him for not calling me like he ...
A. 15 January 2007: Why are you making yourself sick over this You are ruining his time away. That's why he doesn't want to talk to yo. You've said it yourself. He could be doing a million rotten things, why do you focus on these two. Also putting restrictions on ... (read in full...)
I want to go back to my old job, but unsure of BF's reaction
Q. I had a great job and I started liking a coworker ...a lot. My relationship was almost destoryed because of my behavior. I quit my job, not really because I wanted to, but because it would help get my relationship back in order and relieve my BF of ...
A. 15 January 2007: What exactly happened with the old guy? If he's not there, I don't see the harm.... (read in full...)
My ex is taking the split with his new girl harder than he took the split with me... why?
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up about a year ago. I was hurt at how quickly he met someone else and moved in with her. I have a good job and am responsible...I think he was bored with me. His next girlfriend was more compatible with him..willing to go ...
A. 15 January 2007: Who knows. And really, why would you waste any time thinking about it. What does it really mean. Maybe he did love her more. What would you do with that information and how would it change your life?... (read in full...)
Why should you feel bad for snooping and finding out someone is cheating on you?
Q. Just a question about snooping. If you go through your partner's phone/email etc. and it turns out they're cheating on you, why in the world should you feel bad about the snooping? If you never snooped, you'd never have found out. Which is worse? ...
A. 14 January 2007: The anonymous post is wrong. You're saying cheating is worse than snooping? You're obviously young or unattached!
Here's a scenario I've used before.....You neighbour gets murdered,stabbed to death. Your husband had been arguing with him the ... (read in full...)
After my attraction to another-I don't think I can love with my husband, again. I find him gross! Any opinions?
Q. I am in love with another man... I have been happily married for 8 years, although my sexual attraction to my husband was always weak (different story). About 16 months ago I became attracted to someone at work. The attraction grew stronger while my...
A. 14 January 2007: Take the advice of the female anonymous post. As she says, she's been there and did the wrong thing. Seduction of the mind is a quick fall from grace. It's a slippery slope and you've got one foot over the edge. At his point you're only in the ... (read in full...)
Is this email chick hitting on my boyfriend?
Q. I just saw an email from a girl to my boyfriend, i don't know if i'm being way too sensitive, but in the email she says. "I so need to see the sun. I want to get out of town. Seriously. Some place hot?" is she trying to attract my boyfriend or am I ...
A. 14 January 2007: Me thinks yo're reading a little toooooooo much into that one statement. Is ther more?
Let's break it down...."I so need to see the sun" ( I've got the winter blahs )...
"I want to get out of town. Seriously. Some place hot?"......(... (read in full...)
Why does he like to ejaculate on my belly?
Q. Can you tell me why the man in my life always ejaculates all over my stomach, what does it mean?...
A. 14 January 2007: He has bad aim........It's probably just something he fanatsizes about. Have you asked him? Is it something he's seen in porn?... (read in full...)
How do I stop being jealous?
Q. My girlfriend and I have now been dating for a little more than two years. We have had a long distance relationship for most of this time, but plan to get married upon her graduation in 2008. Recently, she started a travel abroad program in the ...
A. 14 January 2007: Well, at least you recognize the problem. That is important. I have to say that I understand and would probably feel the same way. I'm not justifying your concerns or saying they're valid, I'm only saying it's understandable.
I would hand... (read in full...)
Why should you feel bad for snooping and finding out someone is cheating on you?
Q. Just a question about snooping. If you go through your partner's phone/email etc. and it turns out they're cheating on you, why in the world should you feel bad about the snooping? If you never snooped, you'd never have found out. Which is worse? ...
A. 14 January 2007: Three cheers for Irish49 !! Great answer. My anology is this.....the husband is at work....comes home early and finds his wife in bed with a strange man...she yells....You're supposed to be at work !!!!!... (read in full...)
After my attraction to another-I don't think I can love with my husband, again. I find him gross! Any opinions?
Q. I am in love with another man... I have been happily married for 8 years, although my sexual attraction to my husband was always weak (different story). About 16 months ago I became attracted to someone at work. The attraction grew stronger while my...
A. 14 January 2007: It sounds like you have NO RESPECT for your husband. Do him a favour and leave him in peace, not pieces. I really hope you didn't tell him you find him gross and you are repulsed by having sex with him. That would really hurt and be of no use.
... (read in full...)
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