A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, I've been dating this fellow for a while now and things have been going pretty well but our sex drives seem to be drastically different. I feel like whenever I'm "in the mood" he is too tired or just uninterested. Which as a result has taken a pretty severe toll on my self-esteem, as pathetic as that may be. He swears it has nothing to do with me, but this is just a new problem for me so I automatically assume there is something wrong with me. Would this be a terribly selfish reason to end a otherwise great relationship, am I throwing things way out of proportion?
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female
reader, sammi star  +, writes (25 July 2009):
 It's always difficult when you and a partner have very different sex drives. You're not pathetic for taking it personally but you should bear in mind that it really is nothing to do with you, it just so happens that he's not in the mood.
I don't think you should end the relationship just like that, sit down with him and have a serious chat about how you feel rejected and tell him just how much of a problem this is for you.
Hopefully you'll be able to work something out together but that's not gonna happen unless you're completely honest and have that talk with him.
I know from experience that you can work this out if you're both willing to try. Good luck x
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