A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My bf and I are long distance and have been for a long time. We don't get to see each other often, generally once every month or two. But lately it feels like he's trying to avoid seeing me.I'll admit that he does the work in visiting, he's usually the one to arrange hotels and he drives over here himself (it's a 1200km drive). So I try to make all of his trips extra special for him when he comes downWe haven't seen each other in about four months now though. We were supposed to see each other in August, but he had a "family emergency" with his mum and couldn't come down. Then we rescheduled for early last month. But his car broke down, so he rescheduled again. Then we were supposed to see each other at the end of September, but he said he was sick and had bronchitis or something like that, so he couldn't make it.I got really upset with all of these excuses but I've let them slide. He was supposed to see me today, but he called me at 7am to tell me that he crashed his car and so he can't make it again, and that he doesnt know when he'll make it because his car is totalled.I got so upset and angry that he had bailed again, i really let him have it. im sick of all the excuses, so i broke up with him then and there and said that if he couldnt see me today then dont bother ever seeing me again. but now i feel awful because he says that he got hurt in the crash. so not only did his car get totalled trying to see me, but he's also hurt, and to make matters worse i yelled at him and dumped him. I guess I got carried away in the heat of the moment, I was just really upset knowing that he wasn't coming down AGAIN.I want to take everything I said back, but at the same time, I know he's lied to me about things before. Im scared that maybe he's been lying to me about his car and being sick and his family and everything just to get out of seeing me. But I dont understand why, he's driven over so many times in the past, and we've been together for 3 and a half years. I dont know why he would suddenly just start lying and trying to find ways out of coming.Im really at a loss for what to do. I just want everything to go back to normal, I just want to see him again
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female
reader, Nime  +, writes (15 October 2011):
 Why can't you ever go to visit him?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2011): You should move on. If a guy truly likes you he will make time for you. He could be busy etc., but even the president of USA makes time for his wife. I don't see why is it impossible for him to see you more often. When you are in love with the guy, it can be extremely difficult to see the lack of emotional commitment from the other side. It might hurt, but for yourself a favor. Move on.
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