Why does my attraction seem to flicker on and off with my boyfriend?

A female age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Why does my attraction seem to flicker on and off with my boyfriend? It has been this way for most of the relationship. By all appearances, there is nothing “wrong” with our relationship. We’ve had few unhappy moments in these past two years. He is my first boyfriend, and is very respectful of me, telling me he loves me from time to time. We’re both mature people. It just feels like… he doesn’t really care to get to know me at a more intimate level. To me, this is a big part of love. I have reached out to him about my passions and interests multiple times, only to be met with lukewarm interest. I’m starting to really truly wonder if I’m not just an object anymore. He never discusses love. His inner world he keeps private. It’s a guy thing I guess, but I feel alone in my relationship, and I’m not sure if the grass would be greener elsewhere.

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