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Why does he make up excuses for not seeing me?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (19 October 2008) 6 Answers - (Newest, 19 October 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, *onfused about love 88 writes:

my boyfriend and i have been together for 7 weeks now. at first he was very attentive and always all over me. but about 2 weeks later he changed and hardly talked to me anymore. i recently just saw and spent time with him after not seeing him for 4 weeks.(half the time we were together.) i tried not talking to him so he would notice and he did. it seemed like he was back to being the attentive boyfriend, but since recently seeing each other i've noticed that he has gone back to almost ignoring me. i always have to be the one the start our conversations and once we do start talking it seems like he doesnt want to talk to me. he also repetedly makes up excuses for why he's not able to see me. as much as i try i feel like he doesnt care anymore. has he lost interest? i dont really think he cares about our relationship any more. please help me!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008):

There is not a lot of information here, I don't want to assume the guy is a jerk. For goodness sakes, 7 weeks does not a relationship make even in dog years!

Stop being a clingy, needy girlfriend, did he even ask you to be his girlfriend or did you just assume? Who cares that he is making excuses or not seeing you as often, turn the tables and be busy yourself when he asks to see you....date other boys if you want to, but no sleeping around, guys do not respect girls who do no matter how cool those girls think they are, they are not going places.

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A female reader, confused about love 88 United States +, writes (19 October 2008):

confused about love 88 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Yeah, I think the same thing you all do. I think I should just move on before he hurts me more.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008):

I have recently just gone through the exact same experience has you. Sorry but eventually he sent a TEXT to say he wasnt ready for committment. I dont think anyone who treats you like this is genuine and you should just let it go before you waste anymore time and get hurt. It will be hard as you probably enjoyed the attention and the feeling of being wanted, but how good is that feeling going to be when it is for real. You shouldnt have to ignore him for him to react to you, in a true relationship you should be able to phone or talk about anything anytime and not feel as if you are pestering him or being too clingy (Which i bet you are)

You will find someone worthy soon. He isnt worth it

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008):

You need to move on - you sound very young and i'm assuming he is too. this is the beginning of a new relationship and you should both be wanting to see each other as much as possible - if he can't be bothered then move on - it wont be easy especially if you like him but you deserve someone who wants to be with you

good luck

n

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A male reader, Joey 2008 United Kingdom +, writes (19 October 2008):

What Kind of excuses is he making?

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A male reader, dr muthaks South Africa +, writes (19 October 2008):

dr muthaks agony auntthere is no better way to say this. He does not love u. To me what i c is someöne who came to u aming something and its in both ways. If he got it he has accomplish his mission if not he was expecting to get it earlire now that he did'nt he is moving along. I know guy like him gal just get out and move before u get hurt worse

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