A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok so this is probably nothing much but i'm really upset about it. So my boyfriend and i are dating for half a year and before that he had a seriuous relationship with a girl 1.5 years ago. So she and he still writes to each other. After seeing that they chat i got sad and he promissed that he will never write to her again. but he still wants to meet with her (he said that to me) but says that shes just a good friend. and also he keeps her photos on his pc. i know he likes me or even loves me, but i dont know what he could still feel for his ex. i mean, why would you want to meet up with your ex that dumped you? and claim that you are really intrested in her cuz shes you friend and so on. I dont even know what to belive...
View related questions:
broke up, his ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, live2loveandlearn  +, writes (11 March 2011):
When it comes to relationships that one has spent a long time in and worked really hard on, it can be difficult to let things go when it doesn't work out. Some people cling to the past and want that contact with theo other person even if it isn't beneficial to the current relationship. It is like some buried hope exists in their mind that things will work out in the long run. If you feel that his interest in his ex is hurting you or the relationship, let him know - have a reasonable discussion with him on the matter. Do try to not let it get too emotionally charged, because negative emotions running wild can lead to a break-up.
If he is a trustworthy person, however, it would not hurt to give him the benefit of the doubt either. How would you describe your relationship with him? He is your boyfriend, your lover, but is he also your best friend? The one who you can always come to if you need help? Most people generally claim that their current bf/gf is also their best friend, so when the relationship goes south it is reasonable to still desire the trusting friendship you had with that person. This ex of his may really be a good friend that, while any spark is gone, still wants to maintain a friendship. Depending on how he acts regarding the subject, you can use your discretion as to whether it is a real friendship or him clinging to subconscious hope.
|
