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anonymous
writes: We have no privacy.My husband and I have been married almost 6 years and we still have a very active sex life. We want to have sex every day but we have a two year old that is very active. And if we try to go in our bedroom to be alone for a few minutes he comes busting in after about 5 minutes. (We turn on his favorite cartoon but he just doesn't watch it for long if we leave the room.) And he also doesn't take a nap every day-so there goes that privacy time. Please help me to figure out a way to get our privacy back. Missing my husband.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2005): Get a baby-sitter and try locking the door.
A reader, Jamie, writes (16 March 2005): You don't say when this happens. If it's during the day, then I'm afraid you won't have any privacy at all-kids love seeing what their parents are up to! Couldn't you try and save your bedroom activities for later on, maybe when he's asleep? You could set aside some time to spend with him, so that he doesn't feel left out, and then get into a routine of making sure he knows when it's time to leave you and your partner alone. If you set the rules and stick to them, he should get the message, but whatever you do, don't get angry with him! He probably feels left out, so just reassure him that you love him but want to spend time alone. Try and limit time spent in the bedroom though, for now at least. Spend time together doing other things until he realises.Hope this helps!
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2005): Yo!! Your a momma!! you are also a lover. Its a difficult balance and one that sounds worth the work.There is a way, and you will find it. I wouldn't advise anyone to leave a two year old on their own watching tv tho.I have to smile coz I felt the same when mine were that age... poor hun. It gets better. Let your lover know how you are feeling about this "frustrating" time. Reassurance is the key for both of you. Sex isn't all that love is... I know its good, but time together - even with the little one, is special. Make the effort for him, dress up, buy a nice bottle of wine, cook him a meal or two (special ones) - even if your two year old has to interupt, he will see that you do love him, despite not being able to have a fumble between the sheets... yet.You will, I promise. Just keep him interested... explain and love. Babies are not babies for long.. soon they will be demanding more than just your time!Best of luck.. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}
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reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (15 March 2005):
 I am assuming your two year old does go to sleep at night? Perhaps you have reasons as to why this wouldn't be an appropriate time.Not trying to sound judgemental, you really shouldn't be leaving a two year old on his own anyway. He could get into all sorts of mischief or worse, he could harm himself. You and your husband would not be aware if he hurt himself as you would be absorbed in what you were doing. However, you are not able to do this while he is in the house. What about a babysitter? Any friends or relatives that could take him for a few hours? Obviously you can't do this every day but then that will make the time you spend with your husband more precious. Does he go to kindergarten? Are there any groups for toddlers he could join?Obviously, he will grow out of being demanding but you may have to settle for what you can get when you can get it, to put it crudely. This is the reality of being a parent!Night time seems the best option if no one else can take care of him and if you aren't too tired. Oh, and don't get pregnant again and have another one, as if you do, your sex life will definitely go out the window. (joke!)I think its great that you enjoy a healthy sex life. YOu just need to consider all the options available to you.Good luck.
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