A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:A few months ago, I was seeing someone who decided to no longer pursue our relationship any further. We ended things over the phone and it was quite sudden. I didn't really ask for many answers. At the time, I just accepted it and didn't want to come off as the clingy ex. He continued to contact me quite regularly and we met up a few times over the next few months as friends. I guess his contact somewhat confused me and I began to realize that I actually had questions that I needed answering before I could move on. A few weeks ago, I brought these questions up during lunch. I told him ahead of time that I wanted to talk about things so he knew this was coming. I came off as being a bit upset over our meeting but by the end of it, we ended things amicably. He told me that he usually doesn't care about talking with his ex's but in my case, it did matter to him. I felt that he was being sincere about this but who knows, I might be naive. Since our talk, I've had some time to further think things through and I've come to understand his reasoning for ending things. Unfortunately, I've also noticed that he has not initiated any contact with me since our last meetup which feels somewhat odd and I can't help but make me wonder if he is avoiding me on purpose? Perhaps out of confusion, guilt, to avoid awkwardness or even annoyance! who knows. I was wondering if it'd be a good idea for me to either email him or call him to say to him that I simply accept the breakup and that I have no hard feelings or is this a bad idea that will only further push him away? Should I wait for him to contact me on his own timeline? I really have no agenda of getting back together with him...I simply want to clear the air between us so there is a chance for a friendship to develop later on.
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female
reader, LauraxLeex  +, writes (16 August 2010):
Maybe just sending him a quick text saying, something like
Hey, I know things ddn't work out, I don't want us to finish up on bad terms so I'm texting just to clear the air,
Hope you're well. x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): Sounds like he values your friendship a lot, so I think it's worth it to try to keep it. Who knows why he hasn't contacted you; maybe he doesn't want to come across as clingy either. I say give him a week or two to contact you, and if he doesn't, then you can contact him and say what you need to. Hope this helps!
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