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female
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*rixy
writes: I have been with my man for 17 years. Our sex life is getting a bit dull. I am trying to spice things up, but every time I do something new, he comments on it. This is making me a bit uneasy about carrying on. I have only ever slept with him. I am not very experienced and feel I am letting him down. Even when I kiss him he says things like: "I don't want to kiss inside your mouth". Now I think I'm not any good at kissing either. Please give me adviCe on what you think I should do. Thank-you.
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female
reader, shania  +, writes (14 November 2005):
 Whats up with him! Doesnt he know that it takes the both of you to make your sex life work,or does he expect you to do it all? This man of yours,seems insensitive.Yes,after 17 yrs your sex life can go a little bit stale but you can improve it with the help of sex manuals,videos,sexy underwear,long,leisurely baths,together.Try and get close again with cuddles and kisses,tell him,that you still find him attractive,embark on sensual massages.If he still puts you down then maybe this problem runs deeper.If thats the case,then you will need a professional person to deal with you problem,like Relate.
A
female
reader, samberries +, writes (14 November 2005):
Trixy:
I think that it is completely OKAY to try new things. If your boyfriend always CRITISIZES you, that is really not polite. Maybe if he suggests things, it would be better. Anyway, have you tried looking up proffessional or valid advice on different and fun ways to have sex? But before that, you are not letting him down in any way. It takes two to tango, and if he is not satisfying you and is commenting on you, you should do the same, but not so that you end up in a big argument. Maybe before intercourse you can SUGGEST new things casually or say something like "Wanna do something crazy" or "Lets do something new. I read about..."
Second, if says things like "I dont want to kiss inside your mouth.." that is a bit rude. Next time if he says that, you should ask him why. If he says i don't want to, keep demanding. Communication is the main key to a successful relationship. Also, Bad breath is the one of the leading factors to bad kissing experiences. Everytime you think you might see him, try popping a mint or eat some gum. And possible, before you go up to him quickly find the nearest garbage can to discard your gum.
I Hope most of this helps!
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