A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi just a quick question!im kinda confused please can u tell me excactly what a boy expects when you get off with them? I haven't been put in this situation before and i want to know excactly what to do when it comes to it... please help i need to know asap! thankoo soooooooooo much x-x-x (im 13) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, penta  +, writes (9 May 2007):
 Wow. In 'The Canterville Ghost' (1887), Wilde wrote: 'We have really everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language.' Some things don't seem to change.
Thanks for correcting me!
A
female
reader, Just a Girl... +, writes (9 May 2007):
 huni, in this country its just snogging. not sex and not orgasm!!!!! its just kissing okk xxxx
xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2007): Hi there,
To avoid the confusion from the other answers, In the UK getting off with someone means to kiss them. It's not just one kiss, it's when you're more passionately kissing them for a period of time.
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A
female
reader, Pork Hock  +, writes (9 May 2007):
Ok 'getting off' is snogging (ie kissing, nothing else) no romping, no girating etc, or being semi-naked. Having it off, is full blown rolling around the couch, can't find your bra stuff (foreplay) and shagging is fucking/making love whatever you want to call it and by the way it isn't 'two times' or alternate' it is twice and u aren't french. We don't say Mont Royal for Montreal. Take it from someone who is British living in Canada who deals with issues with spelling, grammar everyday of my life. And we say Z not ZEE unless you want to speak like your American friends. Im proud to be Canadian but stop saying American words!
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (9 May 2007):
I should have said that "getting off" in the US means having an orgasm.
(No offense to my Canadian cousin -- and I understand why she WISHES it, lol, but USA is N.America too ... not that we remember the other countries often either)
I've never heard "snogging" though. Tee hee. New words are great!
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A
female
reader, Pork Hock +, writes (9 May 2007):
Ok getting off here in N. America has an entirely different meaning. If you want to snog this lad, and get off then that's it, lips, caresses but no below the belt line. That is what getting off is...you stop the below the belt line by not getting heavy, passionate or making yourself sound like you are wanting it ....be passionate, but know when to pull and away and then depart or whatever you go to...no lad should be topping and tailing you on the first 'get off'...apologies to our N. American friends...this is how it is over the pond.
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (9 May 2007):
'Get off' usually means to bring to orgasm. What a boy expects if he wants to 'get off' with you probably varies with the boy -- some may want to have you do something that gets him off while others want to do something more mutual. It can even mean sex.
But don't just 'get off' with a guy. You want to have someone you know likes you, not just someone who wants to use you for sex. And since some guys will tell you whatever you want to hear to get you to get them off, you may want to hold off on this part altogether for a while.
Decide in advance what you'd be comfortable doing, and stick to the plan no matter what. A good rule of thumb to make sure that a guy likes you (and not just your body) is to be with him for 6 months without doing more than kissing or hand holding before going further. And honestly, at your age, I'd wait even longer.
Yes, sex can be fun (as can other things that lead up to sex) but there are some real downsides as well:
(1) it can kill your reputation if it gets out to people (and boys do talk)
(2) you could get pregnant
(3) you could get a disease (you can get one from sex or from oral play, too)
(4) you could get your heart broken if he dumps you after he gets what he wants.
I got stuck with both #4 AND #1, which sucks, but at least it wasn't worse.
Protect yourself sweetheart. Don't rush in too soon. Any guy who won't wait until you're ready isn't worth it.
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