A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I got married 3 years ago and my husband is a very lovable person. We have an almost 2 year old daughter and she loves her daddy very much just like i do, he is the love of my life. hard working man. The only thing is that he gets hurt right away h 4 everything.right know we have not being with each other for about week, we were living with my parents, but he got in a big fight with my dad so he had to leave, we didnt go with him because he needed to look for a place to stay for us. well me and him have had problems nothing that we cant work out, my question is what can i do or say to see what is really bothering him? is it me or is it something else.please help me. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, jalmetha +, writes (4 June 2009):
 you are still relying too much on your parents. the furniture in your room, is it yours? Take it with you.and if it is not, get a blow up mattress to sleep on until things get better. There are tons of second hand stores or garage sales where you can get some decent furniture. I'm sure you have friends who have things they are willing to part with. So what if it is more than 5 or 10 years old - put your own flair on it. Go to a home improvement store and get some "oops" paint for $5.00 and paint your new place perfect. Also, he is providing for you, why are you spitting in his face? the situation at your parents house was tense, he corrected it by finding a home for his family and here you are blowing him off for a more comfortable life with your parents. Your are bascailly saying, that you are better than him and that he is not worthy of you. Do you think when your parents started their marriage that your mom relied on her parents like you are doing yours? Probally not. So what he got into a fight with your dad. Do you think that was the only disagreement your father ever had with someone? Think back to your teenage years, i'm sure you and your dad had a few fallings out didn't you? Secondly, what was the fight about that would make you take sides with you dad? Was your father disrespectful towards him? Judging him as a provider? Right now you are. Grow up, stop relying on your parents and live with and love your husband. You are too used to your old life style. It's your past. Make a future life for you and your family. There are plenty of women who won't judge but would applaud your husband for his efforts. Someone who is willing to show him the respect he deserves.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey everybody that read my question, here is the thing i do work , and he didnt go to a place we could of gone with, he went to his friends of life apartment, but the friend is moving so he left the apartment to my hubby. know lets say i go with him know there is nothing in that apartment no furniture no nothing. Im thinking of our baby she can not go in to a place like that. I love him with all my heart ok course he is my babys daddy. I know i Should go with him. But he also got in an argument with my father. What can I do i dont want to be in this situation? Please help me!
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A
female
reader, jalmetha +, writes (1 June 2009):
It can be a real blow to a man's ego when he is relying on his in-laws for shelter. Where did he stay when he left? Was it someplace you could have stayed too? You may be relying too much on your parents instead of your husband. You two are in this together. Help him look for a place to stay. Are you working? Maybe a partime job will help the two of you find your own place. I know you are young but you got married and had a child. You are your own family now, have each others back and stop holding on to your parents.
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (1 June 2009):
 perhaps he is too proud to admit something is wrong maybe like some people he fels it's his problem and he will solve it in his own way.i mean you can try talking to him but don't force him to tell you just let him know that you're there for him if he needs to talk about anything and that you're ready to listen and be there for him :)hope this helps.
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