A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:what does it mean, when he says,"Lets take it Slow" in a new relationship? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, SillyB +, writes (11 February 2011):
 Okay hun,
"Taking it slow" after you've slept with a man means he doesn't want to speed into a committed relationship JUST because you guys slept together.
Its a stall tactic to keep his options open - meaning, being available and not in a committed relationship just incase someone of more interest to him comes around. It doesn't necessarily mean he's seeing other people, although it could be, what it really means is that he doesn't want to commit right now (and who knows if ever).
Its a totally different meaning if you two have not slept together. In that case it would imply that he respects you and wants to get to know you better as a person.
Look, if you've slept with him and he wants to take it slow, I'd be wondering why? Are you just a friend with benefits? Usually if a guy is REALLY interested he'd want you all to himself and in a committed relationship. Men are territorial like that. I mean, how slow can he go after sex? He had the goods, now he wants to slowly get to know the personality? Somethings off...
To weed out his intentions, simply don't have sex with him. Goes with every guy, don't sleep with him in the first few months. Tell him that you agree, you two should go slow, and that until you're in a committed relationship you'd like to get to know him better as a person and not sexually. You'll figure out pretty quickly what his intentions are when he means 'lets go slow'.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSillyB: What does it mean, Keep his Options Open? Do you think that is possible he's seeing other women?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2011): Be careful not to confuse taking it slow with dragging feet. The man I dated dragged his feet and by the time he started taking it slow I was married and had a 9 month old son. He was stunned and he's now in prison for stalking me for 5 years then raping me on an evening that my husband was out of town on a business trip. His argument was I cheated on him. There was no relationship between us. I tired of putting in all the effort and him only wanting to talk on the phone for 5 minutes or once every three weeks and never being available to meet up. The truth came out in court. He was married!
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A
female
reader, 40yearsyoung +, writes (10 February 2011):
It means that he is being cautious or just not ready.
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A
female
reader, SillyB +, writes (10 February 2011):
If you have slept with him, it could potentially mean that he doesn't want to get too involved emotionally too soon so that he can keep his options open. Its just a stall tactic.
If you haven't slept with him it means he's interested in you and doesn't want to get physical too soon so that he can get to know your personality first before your body.
Overall, it means - don't sleep with him yet! He's feeling you out.
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A
female
reader, PatientlyWaiting1 +, writes (10 February 2011):
He wants to take his time and feel you out to make sure he is making the right decision. My advice is to not ask him about the relationship again. You will just push him away. All you have to do now is move slow too, go with the flow.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (10 February 2011):
 It just means that he wants to take his time and get to know you better before committing long term. Dont let this worry you. He may just not be ready for anything to serious yet. Therefore he just wants to take his time before committing to anything to deep. If you are worried about it talk to him and ask him what exactly does he want. Goodluck.
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