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female
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*antaree phongnathpanich
writes: Dear CupidI have a friend who I know her for 6 years butI don't contact her since we study in the university. Now she gave me a call because she has just broken it off with her boyfriend and she want me to give advice. I encouraged her and told her don't worry about the problem. "Every problem can be solved". What should I do? Thank you
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2005): There is no real "cut and dried" solution to helping a friend get over the pain od a breaking up. If she was the one that was hurt and didn't initiate the break up then it helps to do exactly what she's doing-talking about her feelings with friends and family. This a way of releasing emotion and this in itself is healing & because others may offer support and insight that can be useful.
Tell her it ok to feel sad. As a way of working through her sadness she could, for example, write about her feelings in a journal, listen to music, go for a walk.
She should try to structure her time and take part in activities you enjoy.
She must remember that any relationship has something to teach her and that she has gained experience having been involved with someone. It is important that she not be too hard on herself. It's life..we progress eventually and move ahead. She just needs time to grieve and she needs a good shoulder to cry on. All you can do as her friend is just listen and console her. That's what friends do.
A
reader, communicatrix +, writes (19 July 2005):
 You've been friends with someone for six years whom you never talk to? And then out of the blue, she calls you up to ask for advice? That's an interesting sort of friendship. Unless you're perhaps moonlighting as an agony aunt.
Since the details here are pretty generic, I'd offer an equally generic (yet absolutely true) answer: tell her that time takes care of what we can't. Tell her to have patience, and that it will get better. And tell her to maybe find a distraction or two in the meantime. Liiiiike...maybe you two should have coffee or something? It sounds like you both have been letting your platonic relationships slide...
Good luck!
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