A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my bf have started talking about different things we would like to try in bed. And this is really good because lately things have been lacking a bit. Like I love sex and trying all sorts of things but I wouldnt say I have any extreme fetishes or anything. Last night he was telling me how he would like me to dress up in these character costumes and was asking if I had any other things I would like to try and suggested cross dressing anal. I told him I am open to trying anything. He keeps asking me what I want though. I think he wants me to be more aggressive and domineering in bed. I am the sort of gal who likes a guy who likes to take control and be domineering. I want to be more aggressive in bed and take control but I start to feel a bit self consouse I spose and I hate it lol Like I would feel bad for asking him to go down on me but I dont want to be this way. I want to be able to tell a guy what I want and what to do in bed. I was just wondering who else feels this way or if you can give me any tips on being able to be more aggressive in bed. Do you guys really like a girl who is aggressive?? And how is the best way to say to a guy what you want or how to go down on you or **** you a certain way??Thanks all! =) Reply to this Question
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male
reader, happy140  +, writes (22 May 2011):
 “I think he wants me to be more aggressive and domineering in bed. I am the sort of gal who likes a guy who likes to take control and be domineering.” This one is not to difficult, I need to put your mind in the area that your “master”, him being the aggressor, has been so bad his submissive woman MOST take control to show him what she wants. He may submissive only once if does not like it (you being aggressive) but it gives you the opportunity to say lick here, put your finger here, say this and the list go on. A lot of men want an aggressive woman in bed. We live our lives trying to prove we are manly and sometimes we want you to “use” us. You can a lot of fun with this one while teaching him at the same time. I love being told to do this and that but I have never had a woman say, no not that way you idiot, hence it always has been an enjoyable experience. Who would want someone rude, hence don’t be, and use your mouth and hands to get him where you want him. Personally I love my head touch and moved to where the attention is needed. “Like I would feel bad for asking him to go down on me but I don’t want to be this way.” Another easy one-I call them all-day teasers-there hot-during the day out of the clear blue says in his ear “I want to watch you lick my pussy’ smile and act as if life is normal. He will light up and be Horney all day waiting to pleasure you. Say it once or ten time telling him your getting hornier-make a game of letting him know what you want but having him so worked up that he can’t concentrate on anything else. “I was just wondering who else feels this way or if you can give me any tips on being able to be more aggressive in bed” Gently move his body to where you need it, whisper that You want to watch him do this or that. NEVER think that when you ask or direct us physically to do something sexual that we are think something bad about your dominance-what we are thinking is what exactly does she want and I want to do it just right for her-that’s why we like to hear you talk about what you need. The biggest problem at your age is knowledge. If you ask him to lick you clit he will lick where he thinks it is, show him by pulling your lips apart and making your clit stand in his face, he will be thankful later that you were the woman to taught him how to enjoy sex-remember guys hate to think they don’t know where things are-I have worked with married men that thought the clit was the woman inside lips—teach him!!.. Do you guys really like a girl who is aggressive?—YES and Y
A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave  +, writes (22 May 2011):
The answer is simple: If you want something like him going down on you - tell him.
If you want to be more aggressive as you say - do it.
The only person stopping you from doing this is you.
Sex is all about pleasing each other, you should do things he wants (providing you're up for it) and he should be up for doing stuff you want.
So many people miss out on great sex lives by not talking or not exploring each others wishes/fantasies etc.
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