A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:What do you think of one sided or unrequitted love? Well it doesn't have to be "I love him and he doesn't" but "I love him and he doesn't know about it. I can't tell him because I am married or so on." Have you had a similar experience? How do you deal with it? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, SuzieDsouza  +, writes (12 January 2011):
It is imperative that you stay positive. Don’t let the condition produce bitter feelings inside you. You should not lose hope of finding somebody who actually loves you. Most important thing to avoid in unrequited love is, not getting depressed even if you get a negative response from the person you like. Love is never one-sided, wait for the right person to come in to your life. Love life and enjoy it’s each and every moment, as life is beautiful. http://www.whatisguide.net/0102-unrequited-love.html
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt is not about wasting time other than writing a few posts on forums about such a situation. But you feel a certain "thing" for someone because he meets all the criteria that you wanted in somebody. But unfortunately you have a partner and you don't deserve to apprach that person with any love interest. It is one sided love and you will know that it is going to unrequitted this life time for he came to your life a little late.
I think more than anything is the pain inside your heart because you can't let him know and quite miserable to think that he never will. It could be infatuation as it doesn't call for sacrifices or commitments and life goes on all the same. Nevertheless, you may even forget that "feeling" in a few years time if you stop meeting him.
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A
male
reader, titan3890  +, writes (30 September 2010):
Put your self into their shoe, think of someone whom you would never ever love.some ugly or whatever person and think if she says she loves you, she is really nice human, things do match between you but it is just that there is no attraction for you! she is nice but not as your partner! would you still accept them as your partner? I think no.
The point is everyone understands that you cant force someone to love you. Either it happens or not.
The main problems i feel are:
(1) To digest the feeling of rejection. To deal and heal the self ego....
(2) To remain "friends" with them forever, seeing her getting another guy (may be guy after guy)...seeing her having casual relationships, steady relationships, having family and so on....and still remain "friends"
The easiest coward thing is to cut contacts and move on...but then you get away with point(2), what will you do about point(1) ??
may be there might be someone else in the future who gives same feeling!!!??
I dont know the answer! I am trying to fight with my own feelings, trying to be "strong" so that I deal with my own ego!!It is terribly painful and it feels life has become kind of stagnant!
Hope you find your way!!!
titan
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2010): Well - firstly I agree with sexless about "there is normally one party in a relationship who is keener than the other" - so much so that I think there must be very few relationships in this world where the 2 people are truly in love with each other!!
I used to teach adults and there are many times when you can develop feelings for your students but cannot say or do anything about it!!
Also it's hard if you have feelings for a man and later discover he is already in a relationship or married etc..
Mind you - it does happen the other way round too! - I have been aware of men wanting me and I not having any feelings towards them!! - ...Mind you - I think I am just an unlucky person in love in general...!!
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A
female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (30 September 2010):
 Yes. And I haven't dealt with it.
When he says he cant give you what you want because he isnt the wonderful person you think he is.
Its impossible to just turn your feelings off.
If you find an answer, let me know.
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