A
male
age
30-35,
*nonymous12345150
writes:When I like a girl I am really nervous and shy and when i don't like a girl i am super confident and make girls laugh etc, does anyone else experience this?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2012): Hi,I'm a grown up woman but I've got pretty much the same problem. I can talk to anyone, be funny and smart, but if I really, really like someone, I talk and giggle like a 14year old, it's like I become a bizarre caricature or an internet meme of my actual self.I'm sure there's a way to change it, what helps me is that when I realise I'm becoming really pathetic, I take an ultra-deep breath and try to relax, distract myself for a moment and then think of an open question to ask, so the person I like has to come up with a longer answer and I get some time off from making a fool of myself :)Besides, I think it's cute if a guy is nervous because of me. I don't know if all girls feel this way, but I think it's a positive sign, it shows that you really care and are not a player who's too used to getting everything he wants.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2012): you're probably putting too much pressure on yourself when you're with a girl you like, and therefore are nervous about saying/doing something that would make her think less of you (in your perception).
In this case, try to not think so much about getting/dating the girl. You can acknowledge that you find a girl pretty etc, but from the moment you have a goal and try to put too much energy to obtain the girl then i think it's counterproductive and will just make you super anxious instead.
If it happens, it will. but at least she'll know your real personality.
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A
male
reader, mrfunny +, writes (21 November 2012):
Yes, it happens.
I cant talk to a girl properly if i like her which is so pathetic because i can talk in front of a room of judgemental strong characters and not really care.
Just be yourself, I just ignored the person being there and it works. I also attracted all these girls i wasnt trying to because they found me funny. yet i couldnt make the girl i liked laugh. You get better over time
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2012): It sounds to me you're not used to the dating scene and you're more in your comfort zone when just being friends with females or not actually worrying about what a particular girl thinks about you. The nervousness is natural, but it seems to me your true self is the confident and outgoing one that you display on an average daily bases. Its always best to be yourself in any situation, although difficult at times, this way it allows people to see you for who you really are and get to know the real you, and decide for themselves if they like you or not. When nerves get in the way, they cloud your true personality and people will see you as just that nervous guy.
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