A
male
age
36-40,
*ager
writes:Here is the problem i have. About 6 months ago i met a girl. Well i didnt meet here then i met her about 2 years ago but i met her again 6 months ago. I started talking to her online. We realised that we didnt live so far away from each other as we used to infact she is only five minuts on feet where as she was an hour on a train. besides the point. We decided to go for coffee and after talking for a few hours we both realised that we had a lot in common. At the time and still we both have partners. I am in a serious relationship so is she. We decided the next time we met up that we would be friends and i mentioned that i wanted nothing more than friendship as did she. Over time we became very close. We started going out for coffee weekly and to pubs and for drinks and shopping. I would stay at her flat till 3am - 4am in the morning just talking. she was very confused when it came to her relationships with other guys. As i was also having problems in my relationship. Many people mentioned how close we were. Indeed both our partners had a problem with our friendship. The problem was they were right to be concerned. We became so clse that there was nothing that we wouldn't talk about. We would lie on her bed next to each other and talk about things that noone else understud. then i did the most stupid thing i could have ever done. I fell in love with this person. She had no idea at first. However eventually we ended up arguing. She acused me of wanting to be more than friends and i acused her of the same. I acused her because when asked she wouldn't deny it. With out telling you word for word things were said and i know feel she wants more and i know i do even though i found myself telling her lies by saying i didnt want anything unless it was friendship. I love her and im very confused. I would be happy if she could be happy with someone who was not me. Just knowing that she is happy would be enough for me to live my life. But right now im hurting myself and her by not seeing her because the outcume for the argument was me backing off?what do i do now. I know that i should totally leave it because we both have partners but there's soemthing between us and im confused. ................
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male
reader, Jager +, writes (2 January 2010):
Jager is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2009): Do yourself a favour and your partner, Follow your heart. Let your partner find thier true love. You are not the one, for her. As for your online friend you deserve to be together. Really..you know that. Now, these people you call your partners, let these poor souls go and find thier happiness, I am sure with all this deception going on they must feel they are missing something. Be honest and tell your girl at home you are in love with someone else....and move on to your online interest. Your young, don`t stay with someone that your heart is not into.
Good Luck xoxo
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2009): Leave the person your with now, you obviously don't love the person B
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A
female
reader, salcantar  +, writes (4 March 2009):
 you know this is a very difficult situation but no one can tell u or part you from her if you really love this other girl.. just be straight with her and let her know how you feel, and you don't feel like she is friendship material anymore. and well in reference to you're partner well if she cares about u they will understand that your happiness is with this other person.. you know things have a way of working out.. you in your heart know who you want to be with so follow your better judgement.
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