A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:alright, long question here: ok so about 6 months ago i had told this girl whom i had been really good friends with for about 2 years that i liked her as more than a friend and she was super cool about it but she told me that she liked someone else which i accepted and so we decided to remain friends. Anyway a few days ago i got to see her for the first time in almost 5 months (which was torture by the way) but before we got together she felt that she had to tell me that us getting together was us getting together just as friends and that it wasn't going to change which i totally understood and i told her that that was the impression id been under every time we'd gotten together. Anyway after seeing her for the first time in 5 months all those past feelings for her just came rushing back and even though i know that nothing is ever going to happen between us i still feel the same way about her because she is such an amazing person and we both have very similar interests and just knowing that we share similar interests and really like spending time together and still not being able to be anything more than friends. So here is my question, she is still all i think about and it really and it really bothers me that we are never going to be more than friends because we had become friends while she was dating someone else and just knowing that i never had a change anyway just frustrates me so much. So how can i get over these feelings of frustration without cutting her out as a friend? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (2 June 2011):
 The best way to help with these feelings is not to hope they will go away but to focus then somewhere else. Now I understand you can't do this on command but it is the best way to get over a girl. If you meet someone who you are interested in and who likes you back those feelings for her will pretty much dissapear and a friendship will be far easier. i would never want to lose a friend over thins and there is no reason why you have to.
Look around for a bit and see if there are any other girls you are interested in which I am sure that there are. Through my life it has always worked that way when I was single. One girl would be all that I would think about but when you know that things won't work out your mind is more than willing to shift its attention else where.
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