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*hyme43
writes:i was with a man for 17yrs, he left me 2yrs ago, he helped me raise my 4 kids now he is helping a 36yrs old women with a drug promblem; he had a gambling promblem, he says i am his best friend but i still am very much in love with him. should i tell him? he says he is trying to get his life together and knows he can never be in a realationship with anyone because he has issues that prvent him from showing love after being in a realationship for more then a year.
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female
reader, mcbirdie  +, writes (27 June 2007):
 I would suggest that you not. He has an awful lot on his plate right now, and seems to be trying to get his life back together. While it may seem that an expression of love is always a good thing, it can often just make things harder on people.
The best way to show him love right now is to be his friend--help him as he tries to get over his gambling problem and to support his partner with her drug problem.
It can be hard to change gears from being someone's partner to being just his friend, but it sounds like right now a friend is what he needs.
Best of luck.
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