A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my current girlfriend since last September. We get on great and I'm generally honest with her. With one exception - sex. Before I met her, I was single for a year and during this time I visited a lap dancing club and paid for an extra-friendly lap dance (No, we didn't have sex or anything genuinely intimate other than grinding - and I was fully clothed). Truth is I was curious as I didn't know much about what a lap dance entailed. Now I'm freaking out with guilt because of what my gf would think of me if she found out. Do I just come clean and hope for the best or what? I need advice!
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2009): It was before you met her and you know not to go while you are with her. She does not need to know as she does not need to know the intimate details of any past relationships you may of had.
A
male
reader, mytwocents  +, writes (12 May 2009):
 Honestly, I think you run the risk of making a something out of nothing by bringing it up. If you didn't have sex, you remained fully clothed the whole time, and you didn’t otherwise ejaculate, the vast majority of people your age would consider this a TOTAL non-event. Enjoy your girlfriend and keep your "dirty little secret."
If she ever asks about something like this, be honest and tell her. But I would avoid bringing up something like this out-of-the-blue just because you feel guilty. You have no reason to--it's rather tame, and common, on the sexual scale.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): yes - not a big deal but you are upset so tell her....
Star.x.
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