A
male
age
30-35,
*ock87
writes:I have been in love with this girl for a long time, and she claims to be in love with me too. But she will not get involved in a relationship with me because we are too young, and she wants a more serious long term relationship (that could end in marriage) that she claims we could only have when we're older ie 19 or 20. She has us holding out untill then. sometimes we act very like a couple and it really confuses alot of people, like me, and then when she gets with other guys i get upset. so then she makes us stop acting like a couple, ie no kissing, or affection so that she can feel less guitly about being with other guys. if i challenge her she gets angry saying i dont care enough to just "be best friend untill we're old enough for a "proper" relationship" and that im just being impatient,she is afraid we will fail now but i dont knowdoes she really love me?what should i do? i am head over heels.she is killing me.thanks,
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female
reader, I'mheretohelpyou  +, writes (2 June 2008):
 Well, I don't know if hs eloves your or not but I'd wanna start a relation with someone I really liked and not wait, because you might lose that "thing" that made you like each other in the first place. Wait, how old are you and if you mean sex as that kind of relationship, listen to her and you can love her in other ways without even touching her, I don't know what these ways are but I know they exist. Sex is something that two people who are in love and who are ready should go through and rushing it could mess up things.P.S., When you think your ready for sex, wait 3 years and then 4 more.PEACE!!!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2008): You've choosen yourself a vey sensible and grounded woman. She knows that young relationships seldom last. She also knows that resentment can destroy a relationship, if one partner is always thinking about the things they missed before getting so involved. She knows what she wants out of life. She dosen't want to be pregnant at 16, she dosen't want sex to take over her teenage years. She wants to have fun and build innocent memories that she can keep for the rest of her life. She sounds like she dosen't want to get tied down with the complications of adult life until she wants to.
For you, you want more commitment and attention than this girl is willing to give you at the moment. You want to get close, you want commitment. Your ready to enter an adult relationship with this woman.
Basically she's not ready. There are no guarantees that she will end up with you, but if you want to keep her, then become the teenager you should be and enjoy your teenage years.
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