A
male
age
30-35,
*hadowabsinthe
writes:Hey all. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 3 years and we were best friends before that so we match perfectly. But since the end of the 1st year the sex has decreased from several times everyday to once a week. I have asked her why and all she said is that she doesnt need it more than once a week but she is still attracted to me the same. Now heres the problem a few months ago I was looking stuff on her laptop cause mine was having net problems and I noticed a large amount of porn had been watched almost everyday for as far as the history could display. I asked her about it saying that why does she watch porn knowing that I am waiting for her. And she said she just likes to watch but doesnt masturbate to it and said she wouldnt watch anymore porn cause it makes me uncomfortable. Now I didnt believe that but I caught her doing it 1 minute after I left the room after I had come onto her several times minutes before I went out to do something outside. She said she was sorry, she screwed up but would not do it again. So I trusted her but recently the lack of sex is less than once a week and she said everything is still the same that she is really attracted to me but it is almost like am begging for sex in the end and I found a vibrator in a draw today that was previously in storage. When we first got it she said she didnt like it cause I am 6inches and it is 7inches. And since I am her first she doesnt like it cause it hurts her. Now my question is can I trust that she is not masturbating when she promised she wouldnt without me helping in some way. Especially since I found the vibrator?? Is she dissatisfied with my size or me? She said she doesnt masturbate but I keep finding porn on her computer after she promised not to watch or masturbate seeing how angry it made me last time. What do I do?
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female
reader, person12345  +, writes (7 September 2010):
 It's not your size. Girls can get addicted to porn just as readily as guys can. It's not your size or you. It sounds like she's just lying to conceal her habit. It also sounds like she's not turned while having sex if it still hurts her. I would a) talk to her about it and b) try more foreplay to get her SUPER turned on before you even try to have sex.
A
male
reader, gigolojone  +, writes (7 September 2010):
 My brother,you do have quite a problem there.
I would say she is not sexually attracted to you as much as she might still be emotionality attracted to you.
When you bought the vibrator,little did you know it would take your place in bed and since you do not vibrate like the vibrator,she is probably addicted to the vibrator and she does get all the satisfaction from the vibrator though she hasn't been honest and upfront with you due to the fear of hurting your feelings and male ego.
If you add porn to the vibrator,truth is,she does masturbate and that is the reason why she limits the sex to once a week because she has discovered an alternative source of enjoyment.
Try to talk about these issues and if need be,if she maintains her no masturbation stand,let her get rid of the vibrator and if she can't,then just know you lost to the vibrator. That is the time when you will decide to move on.
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