A
female
age
36-40,
*i_the_tree
writes:This is it, this is the big one, what i have feared for a while now.Background, my ex and i broke up 6 months ago and he was with another girl days after we split. I have had interest from other guys, but nothing ever really came from them.Just recently (nearly 3 weeks ago) i've met someone. We have been out a couple of times and he is lovely, he has taken me on 2 lovely dates and we chat away all the time. We get on really well and he drops me compliments left right and centre. I actually really like this guy, he's pretty much perfect.The problem is that my ex has been back in touch after not speaking to me for a couple of weeks, saying that his girlfriend is destroying him by sneaking off and even punching him in the face. He jokingly asked if i had any interest from anyone, so i told him the truth, that i had met someone. At this point he started freaking out, saying he had a feeling it was too late as he has now decided that he wants me back in his life.As crap as the last 6 months have been, i do still hold a candle for my ex, and i would like to get back with him, but i still really like this other guy and i don't know what to do about it.Help!!! Please!!!
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female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (10 December 2010):
fi_the_tree is verified as being by the original poster of the question So, i have a small update for you. In the end i told the new guy about the fact that my ex wanted me back, and when i was asleep at his, he actually went through my phone, read all of my messages between me and my ex, and actually rang him and was very aggressive towards my ex, saying he was gonna hurt him.
I woke up and found out he had not only been through my phone, he had used it to phone several of his mates aswell!!! I was very angry and cried my eyes out because he had totally invaded my privacy by going through my phone. Also i realised that he had deleted all of our messages that we sent to each other, and also his number from my phone.
I was so shocked that he would do something like that to anyone, but i guess i'm glad i found out now, before i got sucked into his little game. Therefore the ex and myself will probably give things another try, as he has shown that he cares an awful lot more than the newer guy did.
Thanks for all your advice again.
A
male
reader, Kilcardy  +, writes (9 December 2010):
Some people are just gluttons for punishment. You sound like one of them. My advice: tell old BF to hit the road, that you got yourself a real man. Otherwise, you will end up dumping the dude who's doing you right (and who you like), taking back the guy who has already screwed you over, and ending up alone. Stop. Think.
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