A
female
age
30-35,
*issmepink123
writes:I used to date this boy for 3 years but it was on and off but we really like each other. He kept doing stupid things like he had anger problems and would always yell at me. My friends hated us being together but sometimes hed be fun and sweet. my mom likes him but not my stepdad. we havent been dating for a couple of months now but then he started talking to me again and we like each other but im scared to start liking him alot!! he says hes changed and acts like it but im scared hes gunna act like he used to and play me. what do i do? how do i stay unattached?GIVE ME ADVICE! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, i might be a girl but i can help  +, writes (20 June 2007):
 listen to ur friends ever heard the sayin boyfriends and girlfriends come and go byt friends and family last forever thats the way u have got to think bout it u can do some much more better than this guy just been friends with him thats the best way so u havent lost him and if he has changed or grown up is the better way of putting it than thats good just don't go back down that road again u have been hurt onces do u want to again
A
male
reader, childof1981  +, writes (20 June 2007):
 Here is some advice. You chose your friends for good reasons so it might be a good idea to listen to them on this one. Let this guy go, and find one your friends think is good for you (they often know you better than you know yourself).
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2007): Hi again, Kissmepink. I sure hope this isn't the guy I gave advice to you about in your other posting! (re: I want to make a boy notice me) Yikes! I think you could do better than this guy, hun. You sound desperate to attach to anyone..somuch so you are considering a relationship with a guy, you dated in your past, who has anger issues. Why are you considering on going back for more of this crap? This relationship is not your only chance at happiness. Don't even think that way. That type of thinking will always keep you cemented in unhealthy relationships, if you don't get strong, empower yourself, become more choosier and pick a guy who is good for you. Tell this boy "Thanks, but I like going solo for now. See ya around" . You have the right to do what you want but I strongly advise you against this. Dating is a selection process, so get out there and have a fun time choosing who is good for you...just not this guy! This guy was in your life for a reason. He was there to teach you a lesson on who 'not to date'. Listen to your friends..they are not swooning and all wrapped up in the feelings of infatuation like you are. They are helping you make rational, good choices and decisions about whom you should be dating.. So now, start believing in your 'right' to be cherished in a healthy, respectful, kind way. An ill mannered, bad-tempered boy who treats you this way, is a poor poor choice, no matter how much you think he needs you. Personality and temper issues are not going to improve with time. If you believe they are, you are kidding yourself. He needs some help to learn the damaging effects of his temper on others. You are worthier than this..so in the future, choose compassionate, nice people for dating partners. Always go slow and get to them, first. Look for those good, likeable, great qualities a new guy exhibits toward you and others. By doing this, you are on your way to making mature choices and you are looking out for yourself. Learn to be strong and just say no. You will never, ever regret doing that. Take care, hun.
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