A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have a big problem i met a guy at work a year ago we quickly became close friends and i really like him but havent done anything about it. his wife left him last year and he was emotionally fragile. i have been there for him and counselled him and just been a rock to him without wanting anything back. im fed up of the lies though because he keeps boasting that he has massive savings yet i had to lend him 50 pounds to bil him out. he says he owns 3 properties abroad yet has 4 kids to pay maintenance to. hes now saying hes dating a girl from his past who he says has a son but from her facebook profile has a boyfriend and 3 kids !!!! yet he insists theyre dating. im just pissed off i have always been there for him and am beginning to feel used like im only useful when he needs something why all the lies-he actually thinks i believe all this and i dont but cannot prove a thing im so hurt please advise me
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female
reader, bunny69  +, writes (19 April 2010):
 he sounds like he's trying to improve his image by lying. I would shy away from this man. Eventually he's going to work his way to you if he hasn't already. Are you sure you know his real name or is that a lie too..beware of this guy. You might already be in for a painful wake-up call. Who's to say he's not already lying about you to other people. Using you to improve his image.
A
female
reader, empop +, writes (18 April 2010):
Unfortunately, some of the most charismatic people are sometimes dishonest.It's probably part of his desire to impress you - he tells you all these lies thinking you believe them, and think he's wonderful.You need to accept that you can't change him - assuming he's in his 30s or so, his personality has probably already settled down and he'll probably stay a liar forever.So, what do you do? I have a few friends who are compulsive liars, and I keep that in mind when I hang out with them. I expect it, and get amusement out of it, and have fun with them. But, I can't get close to them.If you want, you can keep him as a casual friend, but I don't think you'll be able to become emotionally intimate with him. Definitely do NOT date this guy. Lying about oversees properties is irritating, lying about seeing other women is devastating. Also, just remind yourself, he's lying to you because he has issues not because you did anything wrong. Probably it would be best if you started spending more time with some of your other friends.
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