A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a dilemma I just want some advice on...Me and my friend "N" (former gf) broke up about 5 months ago, long story short we were fighting and physically abusing each other, it stopped, everything got better, then she cheated on me and we broke up. We've been friends for about 10 years, she is now dating the guy she left me for and sometimes I'll hear stories about him hurting her, her not being happy all the time, and him doing stuff to her that I used to do (I have since got help with my anger issues thank god). This new guy "J" also got evicted from his old place about 2 months ago and immediately had to start living with "N" because he didn't have any other place to go, since he's been there he has paid for their groceries twice, just now got a job, doesn't clean or do anything, and she had to pay the full rent since he moved in."J" also got "N" back into smoking and drinking heavily again after she quit both for 1 year. Her parents and friends agree with me that she needs to do something about her troubling new relationship but she won't listen to it, she just brushes it off and says "but I love him"...Is there anything else I can say to her as a friend to get the big picture into her head? I fear that she thinks everything I say I say it as the ex-bf, which isn't true, I'm just worried bout her cause she's my friend and I don't want to see her get hurt.Thanks for your input
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2011): ORIGINAL POSTER....
Thank you so much for your advice and that article, I hope it will help :)
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